Award-winning author Phil Bildner was set to do a virtual visit with a group of fourth graders this month, when the school’s parents’ association suddenly informed him that he couldn’t talk about his latest book—a middle-grade novel about a boy coming out as gay. They then canceled his event. Bildner’s response, in which he chooses not to publicly name the school, reminds us that there are many factors to consider in keeping LGBTQ youth safe—especially in a time of pandemic.
Bildner, best known for picture and middle grade books with sports themes, was scheduled to do a talk at an elementary school in March, he wrote at his blog yesterday. That event was cancelled because of COVID-19, but rescheduled as a virtual visit.
The parents’ association at the school then asked to see an advance copy of Bildner’s presentations, “the presentations I’ve shared with elementary school kids dozens and dozens of times around the country,” he said. The day after he sent them the materials, the parents’ association told him he couldn’t mention his new book, A High Five for Glenn Burke
After Bildner received the parents’ association’s message, “I asked for an explanation and requested that the principal email me,” he said, but “The principal would only speak on the phone.” A few hours later, the president of the parents’ association e-mailed him to say his visit was canceled.
This wasn’t the first time Bildner has experienced such a cancellation. In March, he tells us in another post, “an accepting and progressive Catholic school” in Long Island canceled his scheduled visit, again because of what he calls “bully parents.”
It’s infuriating but not, unfortunately, surprising. For authors of LGBTQ-inclusive books, this is an all-too frequent occurrence. Canadian author Robin Stevenson, for example, had a visit to an Illinois elementary school canceled last year because her book about the childhoods of 16 famous activists included two who were LGBTQ, Harvey Milk and Janet Mock. Lesléa Newman, author of the classic Heather Has Two Mommies
Bildner, who was a teacher in the New York City Public Schools for 11 years and is gay himself, visits “dozens” of schools each year as an author, he says on his website. He also created The Author Village, an author booking business that helps other authors coordinate their school visits. He knows the power such appearances can have. As he wrote at his blog:
In A High Five for Glenn Burke, the main character is realizing he’s gay. Just like some of the fourth graders at that elementary school. I wanted to tell those fourth graders that in a few months when they’re in intermediate school, they should look for the book in their library. In intermediate and middle school, those kids will be trying to figure out who they are and where they fit in. I wanted them to know this book exists because they need to know books like this exist.
Schools and educators must support all kids, he said. When they knowingly deny the existence of some students, “it’s beyond educational malpractice. It’s cruel.” By its actions, he wrote, the school has shown that it doesn’t care about all of its kids, “And during this moment of pandemic learning, it’s even easier for the school to ignore and erase” some kids.
What to do? Therein is the problem. Bildner had drafted an open letter condemning the school. “I wanted to put everyone on blast and name names,” he said—but as he thought about it, he realized that releasing such a letter to this community “was not in the best interest of their kids.” He explained that for kids whose families don’t accept them, “it’s exponentially worse right now because some of those kids are quarantining in unsafe and even dangerous environments.” He continued:
My heart aches for the queer kids in this community, especially the ones sheltering in place in toxic homes. I didn’t want to pile on the harm. I didn’t want to risk making their lives even the slightest bit more difficult. And when in-person schools reopen, we know they’ll be returning to a hostile and unsafe space. I didn’t want to exacerbate their situation.
He nevertheless wrote about the incident while keeping the school anonymous, he said, because people need to know that this kind of “bigotry and hatred aimed at kids” still happens. I encourage you to go read his post in full and share it widely with the parents and educators you know.
I’ll add that I’m sharing his story not because I think his choice is necessarily the right one for all schools and circumstances. It was for him in this particular situation, and I trust his read on that. There may be other times where naming names is more helpful to creating positive change for LGBTQ youth in a school. The point is that anyone in such circumstances should evaluate matters carefully and do what they think is best for those youth, which could include keeping quiet.
In A High Five for Glenn Burke (which I highly recommend), the protagonist reflects on the YouTube videos he’s been watching of other kids’ coming out stories. “The videos have helped me so much because the kids in the videos are saying what I’m thinking and are feeling the same things I’m feeling, the exact same things,” he says. A High Five for Glenn Burke itself offers gay kids that same kind of reflection of themselves (and gives their peers much food for thought as well). Schools shouldn’t stop their students from reading it or knowing it exists, now more than ever.
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