“Any Decent Mother”: Parenting in The L Word: Generation Q, S1E6

Yes, it’s fiction—but this past week’s The L Word: Generation Q resonated with me as Bette and Tina’s daughter Angie took her driver’s test, something my own 16-year-old son will be doing soon. They weren’t the only characters involved with things parental, though. Let’s see who else was thinking about kids.

The L Word - Generation Q - Photo Credit: Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/SHOWTIME
Photo Credit: Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/SHOWTIME

Spoilers ahead.

Bette’s Crisis of Parenting Confidence

We jump right into the aftermath of last week as Bette deals with a flood of reporters who are interested in her having shoved a man who tried to assault her for sleeping with his wife. Shane is there to support her, and Bette mentions that her daughter Angie spent the night at her friend Jordi’s house. “We were both pretty shaken up after last night, and I just wanted her to go have fun,” she explains. Viewers (and Shane) of course know that Angie revealed in the last episode that she had a crush on Jordi.

Bette then realizes that in all the chaos, she forgot that Angie has a driving test today. She seems shaken by having forgotten, but hey, every parent forgets something sometimes. She then realizes she doesn’t want the reporters trailing her and Angie to the test, so Shane (“Uncle Shane,” as Angie once called her in a text) offers to take Angie instead.

While Shane goes off to do this, we have the big reveal of the season—the arrival of Bette’s ex, Angie’s other mom, and beloved original-show character, Tina (Laurel Holloman). As Tina and Bette talk, the conversation naturally turns to Angie. Tina asks how Angie’s school play was.

“Which part?” Bette asks.

“Well, was Jordi good?” Tina counters back. “Angie said she was nervous.”

Bette says that Jordi makes her nervous, to which Tina responds, “Well, anyone that likes our daughter is gonna make us nervous.”

Until now, we haven’t had any indication that Bette senses more than a friendship between Angie and Jordi. She now gives a little sigh; it’s unclear if this is her getting confirmation of something she suspected deep down or if she did in fact already know. She asks Tina if she thinks they’ve had sex.

Tina replies, “They haven’t even kissed yet,” showing us that Angie’s been talking with Mama T about things she hasn’t revealed to Mama B. Kids do that, talking with one parent about some things and with the other about others. I also suspect it’s sometimes easier for a child to confide in someone other than the parent on the spot who is trying to make sure they do their chores and homework.

“Well, that’s one thing I’ve done right, I guess,” Bette says with a sniffle. Yes, Bette, who is almost always supremely confident, is having a crisis of confidence about her parenting. Parenting will do that.

“You are doing a lot right,” Tina assures her.

They go on to discuss what happened during the assault. “Angie stepped in between us almost to protect me,” Bette explains. “And then he comes barreling up the stairs at me, and then Angie stepped in between us, almost like to protect me or something. And then he pushed her down to the ground. He put his hands on our daughter, and he f—ing pushed her to the ground. So, I … I pushed him, and he fell backwards.”

I’d probably have done the same—though I’m not running for mayor of LA. As Dani, Bette’s PR manager, tried to explain to a reporter on the phone, “She did what any decent mother in her situation would do.”

Later, even after they learn that Angie passed her driver’s test, Bette is still down on herself. “She probably would’ve blamed me if she hadn’t.” Bette gripes. “She got so mad when I was teaching how to parallel park that she actually made me get out of the car and watch her do it from the other side of the parking lot. I hope we haven’t screwed her up entirely. I mean me. I hope I haven’t just screwed her up.”

“You’re a good mom,” Tina tells her. Bette says Tina is, too.

“I’m just glad that you were able to create so much space for her,” Tina continues. They have a little interchange in which Tina points out that this wasn’t natural for Bette, who always “took up so much space” and that Tina found herself putting Bette’s career first, too. It’s clear this is a sore point and part of what drove them apart.

The L Word - Generation Q - Photo Credit: Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/SHOWTIME
Photo Credit: Hilary Bronwyn Gayle/SHOWTIME

Shane and Quiara’s Big Step

While Tina and Bette are processing the past, it’s up to Shane and Quiara to do most of the actual parenting in this episode. We see them waiting outside the DMV, discussing whether Angie will pass her driver’s test. Shane is nervous and Quiara tells her to relax. “She seems like a smart kid,” she observes.

“No, she’s a f—ing genius,” Shane insists. She just doesn’t trust the DMV. Uncle Shane is getting all protective, and it’s sweet.

Angie comes out of the building looking glum to fake out Shane and Quiara, but then reveals she passed. It’s a fun moment that shows another side of Angie.

Later, we see all three of them in the car, with Angie driving. Angie pulls up in front of Jordi’s house. “How do you know if you love someone?” she asks Shane and Quiara.

Shane’s had a little experience in this area, and relates the story of meeting Quiara. “The hardest part for me was the moment right before I told her I loved her for the first time,” she says. Angie, too, is worried about what happens if Jordi doesn’t love her back. Shane ramps up the pep talk. “Look you’re Angie Porter-f—ing-Kennard. Don’t you forget it. So get your ass out of this car and go speak your mind, because we’re gonna be here either way.”

Angie goes off towards Jordi’s door. She talks with Jordi, who indeed says she loves her, too, and they share a short, sweet kiss. They’re adorable.

Shane and Quiara watch (and then cheer) from the car. Quiara, as we know from the last episode, is pregnant. Shane was hesitant about the whole parenthood thing, though, and Quiara had a vision that she and Shane could still be partners without Shane having to parent. (No, I don’t see how that would work well, either.)

Now, Quiara says to Shane, “I know you’re scared. But this is what I want.”

Shane looks admiringly at Angie. “All right,” she tells. Quiara. “I’m in.”

How many of us were also nudged towards parenthood (or strengthened in our existing desire to parent) by our interactions with a friend or relative’s child? Me, for one. I love the way Shane and Quiara’s storyline was handled here. Also, actor Jordan Hull, who plays Angie, really shows her range in this episode, too, giving depth and believability to Angie’s antics with Shane at the DMV, her vulnerability about Jordi, and her relationships with both Bette and Tina.

Angie and Tina’s Connection

Later, Tina asks Angie to see her new license. “I keep missing everything,” Tina muses, like many a non-custodial parent (though as we noted above, it seems Angie confides in Tina about some things that she doesn’t share with Bette).

Angie wants to know why Tina can’t be with her. Tina explains that she felt “like half of a person” when she was with Bette, and needed space to figure herself out. We know that Tina slept with someone else, however, so Bette’s not the only one to blame here. Both of them have done things that are less than admirable.

There’s a lovely little moment, too, when Angie tells about her first kiss, and Tina delightedly bursts out, “Wow! Your first kiss!” She isn’t phased at all by the fact that it was with another girl—as I’ve said before, that’s a great sign that we’re moving beyond fear of perpetuating the myth that LGBTQ parents will create LGBTQ kids. Statistically, some of us will have them, though, and that’s just fine.

Three’s Company

All is not well with Nat, Alice and Gigi. While the three of them were out to lunch, Gigi revealed to the waiter that they are a throuple. She doesn’t want to go back into the closet. Nat, however, insists, “I didn’t want to tell anyone until we told the kids. And by the way, we’re not telling the kids.”

The kids might not know that they’re a throuple—but they know who loves and cares for them. When Gigi leaves, Nat and Alice go into the bedroom and see that the kids have left them all notes. “I love making breakfast with you,” reads the note to Gigi. “I love when you read us stories,” says the one to Nat. “I’m glad you fill up the swear jar,” says the one to Alice.  Ha! Alice is also delighted that her note is addressed to “M. Alice,” which she thinks stands for “Mom Alice,” meaning the kids are finally starting to see her as their mom, too. Nat observes, though, that is also reads “Malice.” “You know, I’ll take it,” Alice decides. They’ve called her something and it’s clear she has a place in their lives.

Family Montage

Bette is being pressured to drop out of the race for mayor after she shoved the man who shoved Angie. The man’s lawyer says he won’t sue if Bette makes a public apology. That’s not our friend Bette’s forte, but we see Dani urging her on. Cut to Bette’s speech. We hear her words over a montage of family scenes—her, Tina, and Angie together on a bed (clothed); Alice, Nat, Gigi, and their kids all together in bed; Shane and Quiara cuddled up together on Shane’s porch and saying they love each other. We also see Finley and Sophie asleep on the sofa, arms around each other, after a drunken night of dancing, and Dani walking in on them—that’s not a happy family scene, but reminds us of the rough patch that Dani and Sophie are having, and Sophie’s statement at the start of the season that she wants to have kids with Dani. Is that dream gone now?

Bette’s speech continues. She tells us she’s spoken with her family about whether to quit the race. Cut back to Bette, Tina, and Angie on the bed, and Angie saying, “I don’t want you to quit.” Bette says she’s learned a lot since her sister Kit died, especially how strong her family, including her chosen family, is. She knows that not everyone has such a support system, though, and that her sister’s death from an opioid overdose is the result of a broken system. “I will stay in the race, and I will fight for my family, for all families, and I hope that you will continue to fight alongside me,” she asserts.

Go families!

The trailer for the next episode shows Shane saying, “We’re going to hear the baby’s heartbeat today,” so I’ll be back after that to cover the ultrasound.

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