English Soccer Star: “Why Being a Gay Mum Can Help My England Career”

Stoney at the 2012 Olympics. Photo credit: Jon Candy
Stoney at the 2012 Olympics. Photo credit: Jon Candy

Think you’re a soccer mom? Casey Stoney, who captained England’s football (soccer) team in the last Olympics, is expecting twins with her partner Megan Harris, who was also a professional player. Now they are going to be soccer moms.

The two met while playing for Lincoln Ladies, Stoney writes in her regular column for the BBC Sport website. Harris’ “desire to be a mum far outweighed her ambitions in football,” she says, so Harris got pregnant and “is still involved in the game but just not playing.”

Stoney, a defender for Arsenal Ladies, plans to continue playing. She does mention some practical considerations of parenthood, though, noting that Harris is due during the off season, “so at least I will get a few months of sleepless nights and nappy changing without worrying about training every day.”

Stoney adds that things are changing for mothers in women’s football, and she doesn’t expect motherhood to affect her career negatively. She noted the “serious lack of support for mothers” on England’s team compared to those in the United States, Sweden, and Scotland, but also said that the new Professional Footballers’ Association (PFA) contracts offer “better maternity conditions.” Last November, Stoney became the first woman appointed to PFA management committee, and she says she will continue to make the committee aware of any further issues for players who are mothers.

She’s a great example of a lesbian mom advocating for all moms. (Because why wouldn’t we?) I also love her vision that motherhood and her career are separate but intertwined. She writes:

There is plenty of evidence to suggest that women come back even stronger after pregnancy and my belief is that if you are happy off the pitch then you will produce strong performances on it. . . . I go around to schools and talk about my journey and I love the fact that girls can now tell their parents or teachers that they want to be professional players and it is a realistic aim.

If I can be an example to them or show them there are no barriers, including being a gay mum in football, then fantastic.

Congratulations and best wishes to the couple!

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