New mom A wrote this week at Two Mothers McGill about her “Non-Biological Perspective” before, during, and after the birth of her daughter with partner T. She gives voices to feelings I’ve heard from many nonbio moms—worrying if she will bond with their child, being hurt by others’ comments about how much the baby is like her partner, thinking about when their daughter will someday meet her donor. Even if you’ve experienced or read about similar sentiments before, however, you should go read her post for the eloquence with which she expresses them.
The first time she held their child, she writes:
I cradled her up against my body, as I’ve held countless babies before her, and I looked down into her dark blue eyes. She saw my face; she saw me. I think in that tiny thread of time when her gaze captured mine, she saw everything. I was on display to her, and she changed me. Something inside my daughter is stronger than the demons I had flooding my better instincts. She told me that she needed me, and that more importantly, she wanted me.
Go read the rest. If it doesn’t put a smile on your face, check your pulse.