Posh parenting magazine Cookie recently pointed out all the federal and state protections offered to new parents. (Article is not online; thanks to Elisa via MomsRising for the tip.)
None of the federal protections, of course, apply to same-sex couples. The non-biological parent of the couple is not entitled to any parental leave under federal law. Since FMLA is a federal law, even employers in states that legally recognize same-sex couples don’t necessarily have to offer these benefits to employees. (In some cases, however, state law requires them to offer similar benefits, or individual companies may choose to do so. If the non-bio parent later does a second-parent adoption of the child—if such adoption is even legal in that state—she may qualify for parental leave as a new adoptive parent, but that could be months after the birth.)
Here in Massachusetts, we’re lucky. The Washington Post has reported that “companies in Massachusetts are hardly ever using federal law as an excuse to deny equal benefits to same-sex couples married in that state.” In New Jersey, however, where same-sex couples can unite in civil unions that are supposedly equivalent to marriage, “at least 1 in every 7 civil-unioned couples in New Jersey is being denied equal benefits by an employer.”
I’ve written before about how the family-rights movement and the LGBT movement need to work together. It’s great that organizations like Moms Rising are pushing for more family-friendly policies. I searched in vain on their Web site to find any statement of support for the rights of LGBT workers and their families. Unless family-rights groups also work to ensure that all families—mine included—are recognized as such, they’ll still be leaving some of us out in the cold.
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You are absolutely right about the two groups working together. I joined MorrisMotheringNOW, a group of NOW members who had young children so found it hard to make night meetings. We started the Gay/Straight Parents Alliance and our mission statement indicates we will work toward economic policies that protect all families, marriage equality for all and safe schools for our children. I have found great support from the straight members of that group for any activity or political action relating to marriage equality and safe schools. However, when I went out to the gay community to drum up support for the paid family leave bill that is pending here in NJ and covers gay families, I had a hard time drumming up interest. Any suggestions?
That’s a tough one. As I wrote in my original article about this, both LGBT and straight parents need to meet each other halfway. I think reaching out to the LGBT community as a whole may be less productive than targeting specific parts of it–parents in particular, and those over 30, parents or not, who are more likely to have the kind of work experience that shows them the importance of employee benefits like paid family leave.
Thanks for the suggestions. I’ll keep them in mind as we plug away here in NJ. By the way, great site. I will definitely be checking it out on a daily basis. If you want, check out the blog us NOW moms just started (and I mean just so we are still working out the kinks). It is at http://www.xanga.com/listentomama. It’s main focus is supposed to be Feminist/Progressive parenting but we have a tendency to rant about alot of things that are pissing us off on any particular day.