Even the Mulleted Deserve Equality

Sometimes, in our efforts to correct one instance of intolerance, we forget others.

Two weeks ago, a Miami-Dade judge declared Florida’s anti-gay adoption law unconstitutional and allowed Vanessa Alenier to adopt the one-year-old she and her partner Melanie Leon have been fostering.

The ultra-conservative Orlando’s Florida Family Policy Council (FPC) sent out an alert to its members last week, describing the ruling. It included a photo of a lesbian couple sporting mullets the likes of which I haven’t seen for many years. Neither woman is smiling, and I doubt most people would consider it a flattering photo.

The couple in the picture, however, is not Alenier and Leon. Orlando Sentinel writer Scott Maxwell rightly calls the Family Policy Council to task for this, and offers up a strong endorsement for allowing loving same-sex couples to adopt.

He calls the mulleted couple “abnormal-looking,” though, and says: “The couple look so odd (you literally can’t tell whether they are male or female) that one might wonder how any judge could place a young child with such a disturbing-looking duo.” Read the rest of this post »

Weekly Political Roundup

• Joint Chiefs of Staff Chairman Admiral Mike Mullen told a Senate committee he is in favor of repealing Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. Mullen and Defense Secretary Robert Gates said they have appointed a high-level working group to report, by the end of the year, on how the military can implement such a change if Congress repeals the law.
• President Barack Obama used his speech at the National Prayer Breakfast, run by fundamentalist group The Fellowship, to denounce the proposed “Anti-Homosexuality Bill” being considered in Uganda.
• The U.S. Tax Court ruled in favor of GLAD client Rhiannon O’Donnabhain, stating for the first time that treatment for gender identity disorder qualifies as medical care under the Internal Revenue Code, and is therefore deductible. Read the rest of this post »

LGBT Parenting Roundup

Schools and Youth

• The Tennessee General Assembly’s House Education subcommittee referred to another subcommittee two bills that would ban the teaching of any sexuality other than heterosexuality. That means the bills’ fate is uncertain, although the head of the Tennessee Equality Project said he would have preferred a vote to defeat them.
• Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell is getting all the headlines, but the Department of Defense is also reviewing a decision to give DOD teachers in same-sex relationships the same status and consideration as heterosexual married teachers when they request a job transfer together. The decision would also apply to opposite-sex couples in domestic partnerships.
• The L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center is collaborating with Opportunities for Learning, a charter school with 34 locations in Los Angeles and Orange counties, to open a school where LGBTQ youth can learn in a harassment-free environment.
• Twenty-six members of Congress sent a letter to the Boy Scouts of America urging them to stop their anti-gay discrimination.

Law and Politics

• Nancy Polikoff reports on a custody case involving a former opposite-sex couple. The father was given custody by a lower court because the mother was now a lesbian. An appeals court overturned the ruling, and in the process overturned a 25-year-old ruling that had said the burden of proof was on a gay or lesbian parent to prove that the child would not be harmed by being exposed to their parent’s same-sex relationship.

Personal Stories

• The Advocate interviews Thomas Moore, husband to fellow transgender man Scott, who is not really the “second pregnant man” despite media reports stating so. Thomas discusses the prejudices and hurdles they’ve faced in finding a doctor, plus some universal issues of pregnancy and preparing for parenthood.

Prop 8 Case and Kids: Says Who?

Here’s a fun one for you. Which of these two quotes was made by a witness for the plaintiffs, and which by a witness for the defense, in the federal trial to overturn California’s Prop 8?

“I believe that adopting same-sex marriage would be likely to improve the well-being of gay and lesbian households and their children.”

“For a significant number of [children with same-sex parents], their adjustment would be promoted were their parents able to get married.”

Stumped? I explore these quotes and some of the differences between the two witnesses in a piece over at Keen News Service.

Weekly Political Update

• President Obama, in his State of the Union speech, said he would work with Congress and the military to repeal Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell “this year.” The Advocate rounds up some of the reactions.
• DC Agenda reports that “LGBT political insiders . . . believe the Employment Non-Discrimination Act is headed for almost certain defeat this year.”
• Openly gay U.S. Rep. Jared Polis (D-CO) has introduced a bill to make discrimination or harassment of LGBT students in public schools against federal law.
• The Prop 8 trial concluded testimony this week, although Judge Vaughn Walker has asked for time to review the case before both sides make their closing arguments. You can’t swing a virtual cat in the LGBT blogosphere without seeing coverage of the trial. I’ll point out the same venues I did last week that have been covering the trial in detail: Bilerico, the Courage Campaign, Keen News Service, the San Jose Mercury News, Pam’s House Blend, and the New York Times through its Bay Area Blog. Read the rest of this post »

But How Do We Support Same-Sex Partners In the Military?

President Obama called for the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” last night in his State of the Union speech. Bravo. I hope the LGBT community—and all citizens who want to see our military strengthened with all who wish to serve—hold him to that.

Here’s my question, though: Once we allow gay men and lesbians to serve openly, will we allow them to serve with the full range of benefits due any servicemember? Including spousal benefits? Including benefits for their children even if they are non-biological parents and stationed in a state where they cannot do a second-parent adoption?

I’ve gone on about this before, so I’ll just point you back to that post.

Could the repeal of DADT be the domino that sets off the chain towards federal relationship recognition, or will the fear of such recognition be the sticking point that once again delays DADT?

I sure hope somebody has a plan.

Quote of the Week (Perhaps the Year)

“The only thing the State or anybody should be looking at, the best interests of the child and how he is loved.”

—Florida Judge Maria Sampedro-Iglesia, in granting Vanessa Alenier’s petition to adopt an infant cousin, despite the state ban on gay men and lesbians adopting children (via Nancy Polikoff)

LGBT Parenting Roundup

Parenting Studies

• “How Does the Gender of Parents Matter?” asks the lead article in this month’s Journal of Marriage and Family. The answer, from sociologists Timothy Biblarz of University of Southern California and Judith Stacey of New York University, is that it doesn’t, with the “partial exception of lactation.” The gender of parents “has minor significance for children’s psychological adjustment and social success.” Not news to most of us, but if you’ve been following any of the Prop 8 trial out in California, you’ll know how important reputable academic research is for all of the political and legal battles we’re fighting.

Politics and Law

• A Miami-Dade judge has declared Florida’s adoption law “unconstitutional on its face” and allowed lesbian Vanessa Alenier to adopt the one-year-old she has been fostering. This is the third legal adoption in Florida by a gay man or lesbian, rare rulings in a state that bans gay men and lesbians from adopting. A sign of change, perhaps? We still await a ruling in the more well-known case of Martin Gill, who was permitted to adopt in November 2008, but is fighting a state appeal. Read the rest of this post »

LGBT Parenting Year in Review 2009

(I originally wrote this as my end-of-year newspaper column a few weeks ago. The Jenkins-Miller case has seen some action since that time. The rest, I hope, is a good look back before we move forward.)

“Whether children are raised by two parents, a single parent, grandparents, a same-sex couple, or a guardian, families encourage us to do our best and enable us to accomplish great things.” So said President Obama in proclaiming Sept. 28 as Family Day. That inclusive spirit penetrated many of his announcements this year, from his invitation to LGBT families for the White House Egg Roll to his mention of the need for “full equality in adoption laws for all American families” in his proclamation of November as National Adoption Month.

Rhetoric aside, though, did 2009 help LGBT parents and our children in our struggle to be recognized as families? Let’s take a look back at some of the key court cases and legislation. Read the rest of this post »

Weekly Political Roundup

A bit brief this week, but I’m sure you’ll be busy just keeping up with the Prop 8 trial.

• All the Prop 8 news that’s fit to print: Some of those covering the trial in detail are Bilerico, the Courage Campaign, Keen News Service, the San Jose Mercury News, Pam’s House Blend, and the New York Times through its Bay Area Blog.
• Federal employee Karen Golinski, a lawyer for the 9th Circuit Court in San Francisco, is suing the Obama administration for health benefits for her same-sex spouse. The U.S. Office of Personnel Management had told her it could not do so because the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) prevents it.
• The Hawaii State Senate passed a bill to allow civil unions for same- and opposite-sex couples. It now moves to the House.
• The Indiana State Senate Judiciary Committee passed a proposed constitutional amendment to ban marriage and civil unions for same-sex couples. It is expected to pass the full Senate, but fail in the House.

Around the World:

• The government of Malawi said it will not interfere with the trial of a gay couple charged with “unnatural acts and gross indecency,” which could carry a prison term up to 14 years.
• The U.K. House of Lords is about to debate a proposal to allow the use of religious language and religious premises in civil partnership ceremonies for same-sex couples.