Archives › Child Development
World’s Largest Study of Children with Same-Sex Parents Finds They’re Doing Just Fine
The world’s largest study of children with same-sex parents, from the University of Melbourne in Australia, has released initial findings that show the children are doing just as well as any others—and better on some indicators. Before you dismiss this with an “I could have told them that,” read on for why this is important, and why we must use it with caution.
Read More...
Supporting Our Children’s Gender Expression: Two Good Reads
Two thoughtful pieces this week reflect on supporting our children’s gender expression, and both are worth a read.
Read More...
College Students with LGBTQ Parents Wanted
I’m posting a call to participate in a study about college students who have LGBTQ parents but are not LGBTQ themselves. I’m not involved in it myself, and don’t know the researcher, but heard of this through reputable channels. Please pass along as you see fit!
Read More...
“Do You Miss Not Having a Father?”
Australian filmmaker Maya Newell gave one of the best responses I’ve ever seen to the mistaken assertion that all kids need a mother and a father.
Read More...
New Video (and More) on Gender Identity and Expression in Children
There have been several great items this week on children and gender identity and expression, including a terrific new 15-minute video from TransActive Education & Advocacy. Have a look.
Read More...
New Gender Spectrum Lounge for Families with Transgender and Gender Non-conforming Children
There’s a new place online for families with gender non-conforming and transgender children to share their stories and experiences: the Gender Spectrum Lounge. The Gender Spectrum organization has been around for a number of years now, and also runs the yearly Gender Spectrum Family Conference.
Read More...
Teens of Lesbian Moms Are Good Students and Happy: Study
The latest results from the National Longitudinal Lesbian Family Study (NLLFS), the longest-running and largest study of American lesbian families, show that almost all of the teens in the NLLFS are academically successful and say they are happy with their lives. That’s great news—but brings with it one matter for concern.
Read More...
Kids of Lesbian and Gay Parents Play in Less Gender-Stereotyped Ways
A new study has shown that adopted children of same-sex parents are “significantly less” gender stereotyped in their play habits than adopted children of opposite-sex parents. That news is likely to be seen as a Bad Thing by many on the extreme right—but as the study notes, many scholars, parents, and educators today believe a more flexible attitude towards gender roles is less limiting to children’s development. Such openness may thus have psychological benefits—and that’s a Good Thing.
Read More...
Birthday Pride
My son is turning nine soon, and it frightens me. Nine is perilously close to ten, first of the double digits, rubbing shoulders with that phantasm of every parent’s nightmares, puberty. Nine seems like the last hurrah of young childhood before it gradually starts to give way to the moods, interests, and concerns of an older phase of life.
Read More...
Gender Spectrum Conference for Gender Nonconforming Children, Youth, and Their Families
I’m passing along this information about the Gender Spectrum Family Conference, a yearly gathering for gender nonconforming children, teens, and their families. I’m not involved in the organization myself, but I’ve heard many good things about it.
Read More...
Lack of Male Role Models Has No Negative Impact on Teens of Lesbian Moms
New results from the National Longitudinal Lesbian Family Study (NLLFS), the longest-running and largest study of American lesbian families, have shown that the lack of male role models “did not adversely affect the psychological adjustment of 17-year-old teens raised in lesbian-headed households.” The findings directly address one of the key criticisms leveled at same-sex parents: that the lack of role models of both genders will somehow hurt children’s well-being and development.
Read More...
Paper Claims Children of Lesbian and Gay Parents Face Negative Outcomes: Don’t Believe It
A right-wing author has published a paper that claims children of lesbian and gay parents face many negative outcomes—but several leading LGBT organizations are calling his work “flawed, misleading, and scientifically unsound.”
Read More...
Child Adjustment: Quality of Parenting, Not Family Structure, Is What Matters
Most of us LGBT parents know in our bones that the quality of one’s parenting matters more than one’s family structure in raising well adjusted children. Not everyone is so rational, however—hence the need for experts like Cambridge University psychologist Michael Lamb, who has recently published what LGBT family law expert Nancy Polikoff calls the “definitive article on child adjustment.”
Read More...
Devotion Project Documentary Shows Devotion of Lesbian Moms
Got 10 minutes? You’d be hard pressed to find a better way to spend it right now than to watch “Listen from the Heart” (after the jump), a short documentary film that profiles lesbian moms Laura Fitch and Jaime Jenett, and their son, Simon Lev Fitch-Jenett. The moms talk about dealing with their son’s serious heart condition, being a stay-at-home mom and an employed mom, respectively, being pregnant and butch, managing their relationship to each other, and more. The film is part of The Devotion Project, a series of six films showing “LGBTQ couples and the love they share.”
Read More...
In the Life Media has posted an “It Gets Better” video featuring parents of transgender children. In the video, the parents, members of PFLAG’s support group for families of transgender children, “share their personal struggles to understand their child’s needs and find support for both themselves and their families.”
Read More...
Post of the Week: “Breathing Room”
This week’s selection, “Breathing Room,” comes from Lyn, who blogs with her partner Gail at First Time, Second Time. Lyn and Gail are both mathematicians, fell in love at Math Camp, and seem to favor the number two. They describe themselves as “two lesbian moms who created an intentional family via donor conception. We’ve both given birth, both been NGP’s (non-gestational parents), both nursed, both worked for pay, and both stayed at home with kids.”
I chose “Breathing Room” because it shines a light on one of the less-discussed transitions of family life, when children leave early childhood and parents are able to take a little more time for themselves and each other.
Read More...
Teens with Lesbian Moms: Stigmatized But Coping
“Half of Teens with Lesbian Mothers Face Stigmatization, Most Often During School,” read the title of a press release from UCLA’s Williams Institute March 8. Yikes. That’s important news, given the need to raise public awareness of harassment and bullying in schools—but it’s also a scary message for lesbian moms. It’s almost enough to make prospective parents return their turkey basters.
Note the subtitle, however: “Nearly two-thirds have effective coping skills.” Yes, our children may face stigmatization and bullying, but that doesn’t mean we should view them as helpless in the face of it.
Read More...
How Have Your Kids Responded to Questions About Their Family?
Most LGBT parents, I suspect, wonder what will happen the first (or the second, or the tenth…) time their children get asked questions about their family, such as, “How can you have two moms [two dads]?” I wrote about my own experience with this a few years back—and yesterday, Mom1 over at 2 Moms 2 Boys wrote about hers.
This was soon followed on my Twitter feed by Els Kushner noting her kids’ snappy response, “Well, why do you have a mom & a dad?” and MommieV saying, “Would love to see how single/choice moms handle similar.”
So have at, folks. I know many of you have similar stories and questions, and I hope you’ll share in the comments. (You can just leave a link to your blog if you’ve written about it before.)
Read More...
New Dr. Spock Childcare Book Includes Gay and Lesbian Parents; Iffier on Transgender Issues
The new, 9th Edition of the venerable Dr. Spock’s Baby and Child Care by Dr. Benjamin Spock, first published in 1946, includes a section on gay and lesbian parents, the Washington Post informs us. I’ve taken a look, and while there is much to praise, there are also a few obvious gaps, particularly around gender [...]
Read More...
Seeking LGBT Parents with Children on the Autism Spectrum
Cathy is a lesbian mom, a licensed social worker, and has a child on the autism spectrum. She also blogs about autism at Autism Home Rescue. She wrote to me asking if I could help connect her to other LGBT parents who have children on the autism spectrum, so consider it done. Go check out [...]
Read More...
National Association of Mothers’ Centers Hosts Webinar on LGBT Children and Youth
The National Association of Mothers’ Centers (NAMC), “a collective voice for mothers and parents in the United States,” is hosting a Webinar on “Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity: Navigating the Challenges for Parents, Teachers and Others,” January 24, from 1-2 p.m. ET. Pete Carney, LMSW Director of the Pride for Youth program at the Long [...]
Read More...
Does Having Lesbian Moms Affect One’s Character?
Does having lesbian moms—or other LGBT parents—affect one’s character? Opinions are mixed, but not just between left and right. Iowa college student Zach Wahls, in his twice-viral video, famously said, “The sexual orientation of my parents has had zero impact on the content of my character.” And a University of Virginia study last year concluded what many [...]
Read More...
TV Alert: Transgender Children on Anderson
Anderson Cooper covers the topic of transgender children in his new daytime talk show today. (Find airing times in your area.) Here are details about the show and two of its featured guests, via a press release: On Wednesday, November 16, Anderson Cooper’s new daytime talk show, Anderson, will focus on transgender children – children [...]
Read More...
Role Models and Manly Things
I was recently asked by a mainstream journalist: “Are you worried about providing male role models for your son?”
I answered, as I always do to the question, “No.” It’s not that I don’t want him to have male role models; it’s just that I’m not worried about it. I think that very often, when the media asks that question, they are ignoring the realities not only of same-sex and single parents’ lives, but also of children’s lives in general.
Read More...
1 of 5
