Makes me feel old to realize that although GSAs didn’t exist when I was in school, they’ve still been around for over twenty years.

Secretary of Education Arne Duncan has long supported GSAs. (Here’s my coverage of his letter to educators reminding them that schools receiving federal funds must provide equal access to school resources for all student groups, including GSAs.) Now, he has issued a special message on the White House blog for GSA Day, which you can see here on video after the jump.

Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality.

All labor that uplifts humanity has dignity and importance and should be undertaken with painstaking excellence.

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.

Here’s to excellent light and love for us all.

Speaking for myself, I have no regrets. We seem to have progressed past the age when he gets noisy, battery-operated things that play annoying Elmo tunes. (While the Super Mario music can be annoying after a while, at least there’s volume control.) I’m probably most happy he got The LEGO Ideas Book, not only because he enjoys browsing through it for ideas, but because I do, too. If all of your children’s Lego sets are in pieces, and the instructions are nowhere to be found—or if you just want to break out of the mold of following the preconceived instructions—this is a great volume.

I am a member of the Amazon Associates program, and get a small referral fee from all purchases made at Amazon.com via links on this site. You are under no obligation to purchase through them.

May the year be full of love, happiness, peace, and equality for all.

Over at Skepchick, Natalie Reed has a great article on “Guyliner, Murses, Bromance and Femmephobia,” in which she argues that girls should not be forced into playing with pink, feminine toys—but also that we should not denigrate pink, feminine things entirely. She explains, “Denigration of that which is feminine is to denigrate that which is female-ish. The misogynist implications are fairly clear cut.”

She also notes problems with the marketing of certain products for men:

The “for girls” marketing seems to have as its goal making women find the product more appealing. The “for men” marketing . . . seem designed to somehow protect or insulate men from the girliness of whatever you’re selling. As though . . . touching it or using it will contaminate them with… I don’t know… cooties or something. Maybe turn them gay. Or trans. Gasp!

It’s a great read, so go check it out. (Thanks to The Mary Sue for the link.)

I’m also pleased by Reed’s note that Edmund Scientifics, purveyor of kits and gadgets to geeks everywhere, has stopped marketing its children’s science kits in “girls” and “boys” varieties, but will simply call them “Novelty Science Kits” from now on. You should go read their blog post about it, too—it’s a nice example of a company realizing that they were “projecting gender bias and defining gender roles,” and taking action to change that.

But Rudolph is much on my mind during the holidays, so I thought I’d repost a little piece I wrote over at Change.org last year on what Rudolph might say as part of the It Gets Better campaign in support of LGBT youth.

Dear Children:

It gets better. I know from experience. When I was but a wee foal, the other young reindeer bullied me mercilessly about my nose. It was not the coal black of theirs, but waxed and waned from a dull red to a glowing, vibrant crimson, depending on my mood. The worst of it was that the more the others teased me, the redder it got, until I lit up entire snowbanks and caused the elves to draw down the shades in their nearby workshop. Even the adult deer were no help, shooing their offspring away from me as if their younglings, too, might suddenly sprout scarlet orbs if they came too near.

I expect you’ve heard the song or seen the movie, however, so you know what happened. The blizzard of a lifetime blew in one year, bringing such poor visibility that the big guy despaired of taking his annual journey. He was afraid he’d be brought down in someplace like northern Canada or Siberia, where even his intrepid sleigh team might risk injury or worse. His clever thinking, though, and willingness to see my difference as a strength, saved the day.

Now I still proudly lead the team every year and everyone knows who I am. Some of the new foals even sneak into the elves’ workshop on occasion and dip their noses into buckets of red paint, hoping to emulate me. Their parents lick it off, of course, but I am flattered.

My story first came to public notice in 1939, and has been retold many times over the years. In perhaps the most famous rendition, a 1964 stop-motion television special, the writers even included my friend Hermey, an elf who was harassed at his workplace for wanting to be a dentist rather than a toymaker. (And let me tell you, there has been plenty of speculation about his sexual orientation over the years — but that’s his story to tell, not mine.) I’m pleased to report it got better for him, too. He now checks all of our teeth every six months, and has even gotten the boss to floss. (Which reminds me: I must write to that fellow Chris Colfer, who plays Kurt on Glee—yes, there’s a television in the stable here at the Pole—and ask if he might want to play Hermey in a live-action version sometime. I think he’d be a great fit.)

As I reflect upon our tale, however, I begin to have doubts. It  has been heard by millions of children and their parents over the last 70 years, and the moral is not difficult to detect. It is okay to be different. Bullying is bad. And if you ostracize members of your community simply because they are different, you might just find that you are getting rid of valuable talents. Yet people are still trying to convey that to their children, and often failing, as the many recent reports of brutal and repeated bullying attest. Hermey and I have managed to lead happy lives, but have things really gotten better overall?

The It Gets Better project launched earlier this year is a good thing, as is the work of GLSEN, Groundspark, PFLAG, The Trevor Project, HRC’s Welcoming Schools, and every other organization working to combat bullying. It is heartening to see so many pop stars today giving bullied youth songs of hope. The classic song about my life, however, was first heard commercially in 1948. The movie has been around for nearly 50 years. Will it take another 50 or 60 years for today’s messages to sink in?

Songs and movies may not be the whole answer. I’ve seen enough of the world now to know rules and laws are needed, too. But if I had one holiday wish this year, it would be for every parent and teacher who watches the movie or sings the song with their children to take a moment and discuss with them what it means. How does it apply to them and their own community? If enough people do that, in conjunction with all of the other current anti-bullying efforts, then perhaps some year soon we reindeer won’t have to carry around such a large sack of coal along with all the toys.

And then things will indeed have gotten better — for all of us.

Happy holidays,
Rudolph

(Photo credit: David Ashleydale)

The Movement Advancement Project and the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) have published a series of guides “to help shape discussions with conflicted or undecided Americans.” The “Overall Approaches” guide is the best place to start, but there are also guides dealing with specific topics and aimed at specific cultural groups.

MAP and GLAAD explain, “It can often be easy to fall back on abstract jargon or angry rhetoric that can derail discussions with those who are not familiar with the issues.” Instead, the guides show ways to find common ground “and to help them understand issues of LGBT equality through the lenses of their own values and beliefs.”

Amen and pass the potatoes.

I was therefore delighted last year when the Maccabeats, Yeshiva University’s a cappella group, gained YouTube fame last year with “Candlelight,” to the tune of the pop hit “Dynamite.” Finally, a Hanukkah tune catchy enough to compete with all the pop versions of Christmas carols my son’s been hearing!

The Maccabeats are back this year, now with “Miracle,” another tune that has my son’s toes tapping. While it may seem out of character to include the video of an all-male (and not necessarily gay) singing group here, I will point out the brief scene (at about 1:38) showing what appears to be a single mom celebrating Hanukkah with her children. Clearly, Hanukkah celebrations occur in all types of families. Not only that, but the mom is wearing a men’s tie and yarmulke (traditionally worn only by men), which gives the scene a certain gender-bendy appeal, or at least a feminist twist. (Bonus fun fact: Actor Mayim Bialik, who plays the mom in the video, also has a Ph.D in neuroscience.)

The Maccabeats are using the video to encourage donations to the Gift of Life Bone Marrow Foundation at makesomemiracles.com.

Happy Hanukkah to everyone celebrating today. May your lives be full of miracles, big and small.

Posting will be light here for a few days as our family will be stuffing ourselves with poultry and pie.