My mom died recently of cancer. While the death of a parent is first and foremost deeply emotional, it also brings with it a host of administrative tasks, especially if the parent has no surviving spouse. Here are three things my mom, brother, and I did to ensure the administrative side of things didn’t intrude overmuch.
1. Before our mom died, we became signatories on her safe deposit box. Here’s why: Many people keep the original copy of their will in a safe deposit box. When a person dies, the executor(s) of their estate (often their grown children) can’t get into the safe deposit box until they are officially named executor(s). That can’t happen without a lawyer seeing an original copy of their will. You see the dilemma.
If the lawyer handling the estate is the same one that drew up the will, they may have an acceptable copy of it, but if not, there’s extra paperwork, delay, and sometimes legal costs involved in getting permission to access the safe deposit box to obtain it. Will aside, being signatories on the safe deposit box may also help by giving you immediate access to other important paperwork about pensions, life insurance, and other things related to your parent’s estate. Solution: Get access to the safe deposit box by becoming signatories before your parent passes. Note that becoming signatories to a safe deposit box is separate from becoming signatories on a parent’s financial accounts, even at the same bank.
2. Before our mom died, we also became joint owners on her checking account. We had power of attorney (POA) over her affairs once she was diagnosed with cancer, but the thing about POA is that it only applies to a living person’s affairs. Once our mom died, the POA vanished, and we couldn’t do anything with her money until we were named executors. That was only a matter of a few weeks, but if we hadn’t been on her checking account, it would have meant that various outstanding bills of hers couldn’t get paid unless they came out of our pockets. My understanding is that we would have gotten paid back from the estate once it was settled, but that could have been a while. Solution: Use the account where we were already joint owners.
[Added after input from my brother.] Especially if you’re managing affairs before a parents’ death, put as much of the “routine” bills (electric, cable, etc.) as you can on autopay through this account. You’re likely not going to be able to pick up the mail regularly so having the ability to manage things remotely is key. Similarly, set up e-banking on this account for the same reason.
Before death, too, if you have POA, contact all of her accounts to make sure that they have the POA on record. Scan a copy into PDF and keep it on your computer/tablet/phone in addition to having the original. You never know when you may need it.
3. When the funeral home asked how many raised-seal copies of the death certificate we wanted, we got a bunch. (I think it was 10 or 12.) They’re needed for the lawyer handling the estate, plus ones for the places handling pensions, life insurance, and other financial matters. Sure, we can always order more, but it’s been useful to have them on hand.
I’m not a lawyer or financial advisor, so do check with them before following the above advice. Obviously, everyone’s financial and legal situations are different, as are our relationships with our siblings and parents. The above actions worked for my family; I pass them along in case they’re worth investigating for yours.