ABC News’ 20/20 tonight will feature the story of Nick and Bianca Bowser, a transgender couple raising their sons in Louisville, Kentucky.
There’s a brief profile of the family on the ABC News site. The piece seems generally good, which gives me hope for the TV coverage, although even such reputable news sources as NPR have stumbled when covering trans stories. My only criticism is that most transgender people I know would object to ABC News’ phrasing “born a male” and “born a female,” preferring “assigned male [female] at birth.”
Nick and Bianca married in 2010, ABC News reports, and now have sons Kai, 3, and Pax, 17 months. Each transitioned before they started dating, but had not undergone gender reassignment surgery, so they decided to conceive with each other.
Nick explained that when the boys start to have questions about their origins, “that’s when we tell them sometimes men have babies, and sometimes mommies can’t have babies. . . . We’re telling them the truth, and I think that’s the most important thing, and in a way that they can understand.” (For anyone else looking for ways to explain conception and birth to children in a gender-neutral way, check out Cory Silverberg’s What Makes a Baby
Now, Bianca is holding off on her hoped-for gender reassignment surgery because she wants to save money for the kids. “If it comes around to where I am able to, then that would be great, but it’s no longer about me. It’s about our family,” she told ABC News.
Take that, all those who say LGBTQ parents selfishly put their own desires before those of their kids. (Obviously, some trans people may choose to have surgery after parenthood; this is just an example of one person doing what she feels is right for her kids, given her particular family circumstances.)
20/20 airs at 10 p.m. ET tonight.