Two Virginia women who want to be moms are practicing by being awesome aunts. Why aren’t they taking steps to become parents? They’re waiting until both can be legal mothers to their child in their state. The U.S. Supreme Court is (so far) not helping.
A. Wallz lives with her wife in Richmond, Virginia. The two got legally married in Washington, D.C., but their home state doesn’t recognize their union. She wrote recently at her blog, I Spy RVA, about the “baby fever” she and her wife have been experiencing: “We discuss names and pretend to pick out insanely cute baby clothes when shopping for boring stuff like toothpaste at Target.” Because they both want a legal bond with their child, however, Wallz says, “No matter how much we want to add a bundle of joy to our lives; until laws change in Virginia we’re left wanting.”
Although the 4th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals ruled in July that Virginia’s ban on marriage for same-sex couples violates the 14th Amendment’s Due Process and Equal Protection Clauses, the ruling was stayed by the court, and stayed again yesterday, by the U.S. Supreme Court, which wants time to decide whether it will hear an appeal.
While Wallz and her wife wait, they’re trying to make the best of it. “Luckily” she writes, “we get to be silly, playful, and overindulging aunts. When it comes to this kid, me and my wife will do some pretty goofy stuff. No. Shame. At. All.” Pop over to her blog for her descriptions (and video clips!) of “Dinosaur Tag” and the “Robot Game.”
Still, they want to have a child of their own someday. She wrote last week:
At the end of the day, I look into my wife’s eyes and I just feel so fulfilled and lucky. I can’t fathom how anyone could deny us the right to share a life together, a home, and we hope with all our hearts…in the not so distant future, a child. As we continue to build our lives and plan for the future, slowly but surely, the walls standing in the way of marriage equality are crumbling. Hand in hand, we’ll watch each piece fall and for every hateful, jagged shard that falls and weakens those walls — minds everywhere will begin to open to the fact that love doesn’t falter in the face of intolerance.
What she said.