If you read just one piece today, make it “Coming Out as a Modern Family,” by actor and activist Maria Bello (ER, Coyote Ugly, The Jane Austen Book Club, Prisoners, and the unfortunately short-lived U.S. version of Prime Suspect, among others). Bello writes in the New York Times about her relationship with another woman, coming out to her son, and why she refuses to put a label on her love.
Here’s an excerpt to whet your appetite:
“So are you romantic with anyone right now?” he asked.
I took a deep breath, knowing that my answer, and his response, would have an impact on our lives for a very long time.
He was right; I was with someone romantically and I hadn’t told him. I had become involved with a woman who was my best friend, and, as it happens, a person who is like a godmother to my son.
The real beauty of the piece, however, is in her exploration of the term “partner,” and the many different meanings it can have, as well as why she considers herself a “whatever.” It’s not that her view is any better or any worse than anyone else’s; many of us, myself included, are happy to identify with one of the traditional LGBT labels. It’s her insistence in defining her own identity and her comfort with that decision that has my respect.
And I want her last three lines engraved on a plaque for my wall:
Whomever I love, however I love them, whether they sleep in my bed or not, or whether I do homework with them or share a child with them, “love is love.” And I love our modern family.
Maybe, in the end, a modern family is just a more honest family.