Where Are the LGBT Biographies for Kids?

My third-grade son has been enjoying biographies, learning things even I didn’t know about Thomas Edison and Benjamin Franklin. So when I read that Frank Kameny, one of the founding fathers of the gay equality movement, was honored November 15 by a memorial service at the Cannon House Office Building near the U.S. Capitol, I had to wonder: Why are there almost no elementary- and middle school-grade biographies of prominent LGBT people that show them as LGBT people?

The fact is, children’s books about real LGBT people and LGBT civil rights events are even scarcer than children’s LGBT-inclusive fiction books. The Harvey Milk Story, by Kari Krakow (Two Lives, 2002), is the only picture-book biography of an LGBT person in which the person is openly LGBT.

I’ve also found two middle-grade biographies of Ellen Degeneres, by Sherry Beck Paprocki (Chelsea House, 2009) and Katie Sharp (Lucent Books, 2010), which describe her coming out and how it impacted her life.

But that’s about it until we reach high school-level material. Read the rest of this post »

“Girls” Toys and “Boys” Toys: Some Progress and Some Cautions

The winter holidays always seem to highlight that the world tends to divide toys into “girls” and “boys” varieties. Most of us here, I think, would agree that  no one should be forced into particular types of play based on real or perceived gender.

Over at Skepchick, Natalie Reed has a great article on “Guyliner, Murses, Bromance and Femmephobia,” in which she argues that girls should not be forced into playing with pink, feminine toys—but also that we should not denigrate pink, feminine things entirely. She explains, “Denigration of that which is feminine is to denigrate that which is female-ish. The misogynist implications are fairly clear cut.”

She also notes problems with the marketing of certain products for men:

The “for girls” marketing seems to have as its goal making women find the product more appealing. The “for men” marketing . . . seem designed to somehow protect or insulate men from the girliness of whatever you’re selling. As though . . . touching it or using it will contaminate them with… I don’t know… cooties or something. Maybe turn them gay. Or trans. Gasp!

It’s a great read, so go check it out. (Thanks to The Mary Sue for the link.)

I’m also pleased by Reed’s note that Edmund Scientifics, purveyor of kits and gadgets to geeks everywhere, has stopped marketing its children’s science kits in “girls” and “boys” varieties, but will simply call them “Novelty Science Kits” from now on. You should go read their blog post about it, too—it’s a nice example of a company realizing that they were “projecting gender bias and defining gender roles,” and taking action to change that.

Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer Says “It Gets Better”

My last name is the same as that of the famous reindeer. I also have red hair—which meant I was the target of quite a number of  ”Rudolph the Red-Haired Person” jabs when I was a kid. It wasn’t bullying, but it was annoying, until I learned to embrace the difference and just lord it over the other kids that I had an “in” with the big guy up at the Pole. (They seemed not to pick up on the fact that my family is Jewish.)

But Rudolph is much on my mind during the holidays, so I thought I’d repost a little piece I wrote over at Change.org last year on what Rudolph might say as part of the It Gets Better campaign in support of LGBT youth.

Dear Children:

It gets better. I know from experience. When I was but a wee foal, the other young reindeer bullied me mercilessly about my nose. It was not the coal black of theirs, but waxed and waned from a dull red to a glowing, vibrant crimson, depending on my mood. The worst of it was that the more the others teased me, the redder it got, until I lit up entire snowbanks and caused the elves to draw down the shades in their nearby workshop. Even the adult deer were no help, shooing their offspring away from me as if their younglings, too, might suddenly sprout scarlet orbs if they came too near. Read the rest of this post »

Families Make the Holidays — and Love Makes a Family

Happy holidays to you and yours from me and mine. Posting will be light here through New Year’s, but I’ll be putting up a few things, so do stop by. In the meantime, please enjoy  ”Love Makes a Family,” a video from Zach Wahls and MoveOn.org, and once again, celebrate the amazing diversity and love of families everywhere.

To Grandmother’s House We Go: Talking About LGBT Issues at Holiday Time

Visiting relatives (or having them visit) for the holidays? Worried about what will happen when conversation over the roast goose (or latkes) turns political, and you find yourself trying to explain to Aunt Mabel why you and your beloved want an actual, legal, marriage? Or why military readiness hasn’t suffered from the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell?

The Movement Advancement Project and the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) have published a series of guides “to help shape discussions with conflicted or undecided Americans.” The “Overall Approaches” guide is the best place to start, but there are also guides dealing with specific topics and aimed at specific cultural groups.

MAP and GLAAD explain, “It can often be easy to fall back on abstract jargon or angry rhetoric that can derail discussions with those who are not familiar with the issues.” Instead, the guides show ways to find common ground “and to help them understand issues of LGBT equality through the lenses of their own values and beliefs.”

Amen and pass the potatoes.

How a First-Grade Teacher Addresses Gender Stereotypes and Variance

Here’s today’s must-read article: Melissa Bollow Tempel, a first-grade teacher in Jackson, Wisconsin, has written at Together For Jackson County Kids about how she approaches issues of gender stereotypes, gender variance, and gender-based bullying. It’s full of insight and actionable ideas. Good stuff, and worth sharing.

(For more on the topic, you might also want to read my interview with Stephanie Brill, executive director and founder of  Gender Spectrum, which supports families that have gender variant, gender non-conforming, and transgender children.)

Hanukkah Songs and Miracles

Like many of the Hebraic persuasion, I’ve always felt a little shortchanged when it comes to holiday songs. Radio stations play hours of Christmas carols without repeats, whereas we’re pretty much stuck with “I Had a Little Dreidel” and “Hanukkah, Oh, Hanukkah.” (I know, there are a handful of other traditional tunes, but really, just a handful.)

I was therefore delighted last year when the Maccabeats, Yeshiva University’s a cappella group, gained YouTube fame last year with “Candlelight,” to the tune of the pop hit “Dynamite.” Finally, a Hanukkah tune catchy enough to compete with all the pop versions of Christmas carols my son’s been hearing!

The Maccabeats are back this year, now with “Miracle,” another tune that has my son’s toes tapping. While it may seem out of character to include the video of an all-male (and not necessarily gay) singing group here, I will point out the brief scene (at about 1:38) showing what appears to be a single mom celebrating Hanukkah with her children. Clearly, Hanukkah celebrations occur in all types of families. Not only that, but the mom is wearing a men’s tie and yarmulke (traditionally worn only by men), which gives the scene a certain gender-bendy appeal, or at least a feminist twist. (Bonus fun fact: Actor Mayim Bialik, who plays the mom in the video, also has a Ph.D in neuroscience.)

The Maccabeats are using the video to encourage donations to the Gift of Life Bone Marrow Foundation at makesomemiracles.com.

Happy Hanukkah to everyone celebrating today. May your lives be full of miracles, big and small.

Top Lesbian and Gay Parenting Books of 2011

This year brought us several new books, fiction and non-fiction, featuring lesbian- and gay-headed familes. While we might hope for greater quantity (and greater diversity across lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender parents), the quality was at least very good. Here are some of the best.  Read the rest of this post »