Back in a Few

I’m taking a few days off because of a family emergency. Thanks for your understanding.

Weekly Political Roundup

Keeping it short this week, since I need to go figure out how to build an emergency shelter out of Legos before the storm hits. Hope all of you are staying safe, too.

• The White House and the Department of Homeland Security confirmed that same-sex spouses and partners will be considered in case-by-case reviews of the approximately 300,000 immigrants currently in deportation proceedings. Immigration Equality has the rundown on what this means (and doesn’t mean) for our families.
• Gay and lesbian demographics made the front page of the New York Times, after a new analysis by UCLA’s Williams Institute of 2010 Census data. San Francisco and West Hollywood no longer reign. Provincetown, Mass. (also long a gay mecca), is now the leading city in terms of the proportion of same-sex couples, and Washington, D.C. is the leading “state” (loosely speaking). (Countdown to how long it will take the far-right to blame the East Coast hurricane on The Gays. . . .)
• Marriage equality advocates in Maine are off and running in their quest to collect enough signatures to put a pro-equality measure on the 2012 state ballot.
• Adam Ebbin looks likely to become the first openly LGBT Virginia state senator, when he won what the Gay and Lesbian Victory fund called “an all but determinative primary.”

Around the world:

• The U.K. home office halted the deportation of a gay Ugandan man from the U.K., even though a judge decided that his case was not credible. Supporters say his case was not properly considered, and they hope it will be.
• U.K. Prime Minister David Cameron

Battening Down

Earthquakes, hurricanes . . . I’m waiting for the locusts. We’re battening down the hatches here in New England in preparation for Hurricane Irene. I usually cast a skeptical eye on the sensationalist weather forecasting that seems to be the norm these days, but in this case, I think precautions are warranted. Best wishes to those of you also braving the storm down south.

Here’s what the National Hurricane Center says about preparing for a hurricane. Don’t forget to tuck your important papers someplace waterproof and close at hand. The NHC recommends “insurance, medical records, bank account numbers, Social Security card,”  but I’d add (as applicable) adoption papers, parentage orders, children’s birth certificates, powers of attorney, etc.

Be safe, everyone!

What Are Your Back-to-School Concerns?

It’s back-to-school time, so let’s do a fun little poll for all of us who have children braving the wilds of education:

Judge Tells Gay Dad Kids Can’t Stay with Husband

A gay dad whose former wife has custody of their children has been granted visitation—as long as he does not leave them alone with any man to whom they are not related “by blood or adoption.” The dad, however, remarried—he and his now-husband wed in Connecticut.

As Geoff Berg of the Houston Chronicle pointed, out, “So if, for example, William wants to visit his mother in the hospital (where she’s been for several weeks), he can’t leave his kids at home with his husband.” Neither party alleged that the children had ever been abused.

Berg notes astutely, “The primary mandate of family courts is to protect the best interest of the child. So why erect barriers to the functioning of William and Jim’s family in the first place?”

Darn good question.

10 Books Every LGBT Parent Should Read

(Originally published with slight variation as my Mombian newspaper column.)

Books about LGBT parenting are few and far between, but here are ten that I recommend for all LGBT parents and prospective parents. I chose works that each showcase a variety of voices, rather than single-person memoirs, so each one would resonate as widely as possible. I also chose books that focus on the emotional side of parenting rather than medical and legal how-to works, since the latter tend to be specific to particular segments of the LGBT community.

I hope these selections, taken together, will help us better understand our collective, yet diverse, experience of being LGBT parents.

Feel free to add further suggestions in the comments.

Read the rest of this post »

The Allure of Old-Fashioned Games

It’s been one of those weeks, so I’m going to forgo my usual political roundup for something a little more lighthearted. On our vacation last week, my spouse and I played some fierce games of  Scrabble. It’s a long-time habit with us, and we in fact own travel Scrabble sets in at least three different sizes. (Geeks, I know.) Our eight-year-old son even joined us for a few games and managed to hold his own. (We let him use the dictionary, which seems to be helpful in making him feel more equal.)

When we got back home, I lured him away from the Wii long enough to teach him concentration, the card game where we spread the deck upside down and try to make pairs by flipping over two cards at a time. I started playing with my mom when I was about his age or younger, and quickly outpaced her. Our son isn’t quite there yet, but check back next week.

What are your favorite classic games from childhood? While you’re thinking about it, you can go play virtual Etch A Sketch.

BlogHer Shoutouts

BlogHer ’11 has been over for more than a week now, but I went right from the conference to an extended vacation with my in-laws. They took all of us, plus my spouse’s siblings and their kids, on a cruise to Mexico (about which more later), but since I bled money every time I logged in from the boat, I didn’t do much blogging that week. (Sitting on the Lido Deck with a cocktail was more compelling at the time.) When I got home, both the lawn and the laundry pile were several feet high.

But I want to give a big shout out to all of the bloggers I met there, especially ones I’ve known virtually or read for some time, including Vikki of Up Popped a Fox, Shannon of Peter’s Cross Station, Deborah of Peaches and Coconuts, Riese of Autostraddle, Autumn of Pam’s House Blend, Elisa of Mother Talkers, Gloria Pan of Moms Clean Air Force and Moms Rising, and of course Polly of LesbianDad, who is also Director of Conference Programming at BlogHer. (If I’ve left you out, apologies! It wasn’t intentional.)

Finally, a special thank you to my fellow panelists and our moderator, Ana Flores of Spanglish Baby, Tracey Friley of One Brown Girl, and Deb Rox of 3 Smart Girlz and Deb on the Rocks.

If any of you want to read through the live blog of our panel, “Minding Your Own Business – When diversity is simply good business,” it’s here. I’m completely impressed that the liveblogger was able to capture so much. I certainly can’t type that fast.

Overall, it was a weekend of connection and inspiration, full of talented, intelligent, yet (as far as I could tell) down-to-earth women (and a few men), not all of whom wanted the same thing from blogging or approached it the same way. Great stuff.

Next year in New York, ladies!