10 Ideas for Things to Write About on Blogging for LGBT Families Day

Tomorrow is the 6th Annual Blogging for LGBT Families Day! I welcome supportive posts on all aspects of LGBT families—but if you’re having trouble coming up with an idea, here are a few to consider:

1. A personal story about your child(ren)
2. A story about your own parent(s)
3. A personal story about an LGBT family you know
4. A philosophical reflection on what parenting means to you (or why you want to become a parent, if you are not yet one)
5. If I could change one thing to make my state/country better for LGBT families, it would be. . . .
6. Something you have in common with a non-LGBT family (if you are LGBT; vice versa if you are not)
7. A piece of local or national political news/legislation that affects you as a family (for good or bad)
8. A children’s book or show that reflects an important aspect of your family (family structure, race/ethnicity, values, etc.)
9. Why you think we need more children’s books/media that reflect a certain aspect of your family
10. If you could tell the world one thing about your family, it would be. . . .

Just post at your usual blog, and submit the post here to be added to the master list for everyone to see. (You can submit it through the form at the bottom of this post if you have it done already.)

Please grab a banner after the jump and promote the event on your site, Facebook, Twitter, etc. The more people who participate, the more impact our voices will have.

Read the rest of this post »

Happy Memorial Day – Get Your Posts Ready for Blogging for LGBT Families Day

Happy Memorial Day weekend to all! I hope you’re all setting off to do something fun with your families. I also hope you’re getting ready to post next Wednesday, June 1 for the 6th Annual Blogging for LGBT Families Day!

Just post at your usual blog, and submit the post here to be added to the master list for everyone to see. (You can submit it through the form at the bottom of this post if you have it done already.)

Please grab a banner after the jump and promote the event on your site, Facebook, Twitter, etc. The more people who participate, the more impact our voices will have.

Read the rest of this post »

Speaking Up for Same-Sex Parents in Texas

ABC News’ “What Would You Do?” series recently set up a hidden camera scenario in a diner near Dallas, Texas, in which an actor pretending to be a homophobic waitress harassed two lesbian moms and their children, and then two gay dads and their children (all also played by actors).

Several patrons, to their credit, spoke up for the couples and told the waitress her behavior was unacceptable.

While this is hardly a scientific study, it gives me hope that attitudes are changing. (Was I the only one, though, who worried about the effect even the pretend scenario might have on the child actors? I hope someone sat them down and really explained what was going on.)

At the same time, videos like this one from the National LGBT Cancer Network—part of a new training program for healthcare professionals—indicates we still have a long way to go. At 1:34 in the video, lesbian mom Rosemary talks of bringing her child to a hospital that refused to let in both her and the girl’s other mother.

New York Times’ “Coming Out” Youth Project

If you have not yet seen the New York Times’ excellent Coming Out project, which showcases the voices, words, and pictures of a diverse group of LGBTQ youth, get thee to their site and browse through it. There’s also a good introductory article here. Their stories are touching, sometimes heart-wrenching, but always inspiring. (Stories can still be submitted, as well.)

Kudos to the Times for doing more than just dwelling on the negative stories of LGBTQ youth (bullying, suicides, etc.), and finding a way to share the fullness of their lives.

LGBT Parenting Roundup

A motley assortment for our motley families:

Personal Profiles

• The Annapolis Capital profiled lesbian moms Melanie Morris and Angela Delano on Mother’s Day. It’s a run-of-the-mill profile, as such things go—but when commenters objected to the piece, editor and publisher Tom Marquardt almost published an apology for running it. His staff convinced him not to, but his draft leaked. Uproar ensued, and even made the pages of the Washington Post. Sigh.
• DelawareOnline speaks with several older and adult children of LGBTQ parents about their families, marriage equality in Delaware, and their experiences with COLAGE, the national organization for people with LGBTQ parents.
• Vikki at Up Popped a Fox shares her son’s reaction to the pending Minnesota ballot on a constitutional amendment banning same-sex couples from marriage. Gives me hope.

Family Creation

• Lavender Luz at BlogHer is hosting a blog carnival on “The Dollars and $ense of Family Building.” She asks, “What does it mean that money has to change hands in order to bring a child into your family? What role can finances play in determining which path people take and how far that path goes?” I’m thinking many of us lesbian moms have a few thoughts on the matter. If you want to contribute, submit a post here.

Politics and Law

• Washington State has enacted a version of the Uniform Parentage Act. Among other things, explains lawyer Nancy Polikoff, the new law “explicitly encompasses registered domestic partners in all the provisions that are applicable to spouses,” and “persons in a domestic partnership are both presumed the parents of a child born to one of them. And ‘a person is presumed to be the parent of a child if, for the first two years of the child’s life, the person resided in the same household with the child and openly held out the child as his or her own.’”
• A Louisiana House panel deferred a bill that would have allowed same-sex couples to adopt in the state. (Thanks for the tip, Stephanie!)
• Now In Gay Chicago profiled Illinois state Rep. Kelly Cassidy, the lesbian mom of three, who shared her views on attempts to allow private adoption agencies to refuse their services to same-sex couples.
• A committee of the South Australia parliament has recommended changes to existing law to remove discrimination against lesbian and gay parents, including legal parentage rights for non-bio mothers, access to reproductive technology, and the same adoption rights as opposite-sex couples.

Entertainment

• Rainbow Rumpus, the online magazine for kids and teens with LGBT parents, has launched a free series of downloadable books “designed to fight bullying and promote acceptance. Each book tells a story about a child with lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender parents, and gives parents and teachers tools for talking about family diversity.”

Research Request

• Dr. Roger Mills-Koonce, a research scientist at the Center for Developmental Science at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, is seeking “to recruit a sample of lesbian mothers and gay fathers who are willing to participate in future research on parenting behaviors and family functioning in households headed by one or two lesbian mothers or gay fathers.” If you are interested, you may find further information and a short survey here.

Same-Sex Weddings Inspire Pioneering Author’s New Picture Book

More than 20 years after she wrote Heather Has Two Mommies, the first picture book for and about children with lesbian parents, Lesléa Newman is still turning out must-reads for lesbian families. Her latest work, Donovan’s Big Day, is a delightful story about a boy preparing for the wedding of his two moms.

Newman, who has over 60 books for children, young adults, and adults to her name, along with numerous literary awards, said she wrote Donovan to be “pure, joyful celebration,” a “gift that I wanted to give our community.”

She got the idea for Donovan in the shower, where she was reflecting that many books featuring gay parents also centered around some kind of “issue.” As an example, she points to Heather itself, which focused on a girl trying to understand why she doesn’t have a dad.

She left “issues” out of Donovan entirely. The young boy has only the problems any child might face while attending a wedding of any sort. He has to dress up, keep clean, and not fidget. Most of all, he has to make sure to hand his moms their rings at the proper moment.

There is just enough light tension to keep young readers engaged as Donovan goes through each step of his preparations. Illustrator Mike Dutton’s dynamic gouache drawings capture Donovan’s earnest spirit with gentle humor.

In creating the character, Newman said, “I just tried to remember what it was like to be a child and to see the day from the child’s perspective.” Read the rest of this post »

Weekly Political Roundup

• A Gallup poll finds what an earlier Washington Post/ABC News poll did: a majority of Americans now support marriage for same-sex couples.
• The Connecticut House passed a bill that would bar discrimination based on gender identity or expression in employment, housing, and public accommodations (including restrooms).
• New York state senator Martin Golden introduced a bill that would prevent recognition of marriages of same-sex couples from other jurisdictions. The state currently recognizes such marriages, even though its own marriage equality legislation is still making its way forward. Golden said his main purpose was to “[send] a message.”
• The Rhode Island House voted in favor of a civil union bill.
• Rumor has it that Tammy Baldwin (D), U.S. Representative from Wisconsin, may run for the Senate seat being vacated by Senator Herb Kohl (D). If elected, she would become the first openly gay U.S. senator.

Around the world:

• The mayor of Moscow has once again denied gay rights activists permission to hold a Pride march.
• Not news, exactly, but you should take a couple of minutes to watch this LGBT-rights video, from the group organizing a Pride celebration in Singapore. Truly positive and touching.

Going to BlogHer? Say Hi!

Hard to believe I’m talking about August already, but I’ll be speaking at the big BlogHer conference for women bloggers at the beginning of August in San Diego. If any of you are going, drop me a note. I’d love to meet you!

I’ll be on the “Minding Your Own Business – When diversity is simply good business” panel, along with Deb Rox, Ana Flores, Angela Benton, Denene Millner and Tracey Friley. Here’s the official blurb:

Television and print advertising get disproportionate marketing dollars vs. online. Why? Well, change is hard, for one thing. But also: Advertisers believe they know every little detail about who is seeing their advertising in those media. Subscriber information and services like Nielsen break down audience into easily identified buckets. But online can also offer the ability to target niche audiences. The existence of entire departments within PR firms and brand marketing organizations dedicated to finding and reaching diverse audiences speaks to the fertile opportunity. But if you’re building an affinity community online, are you finding that the niche marketers are banging on your door?

We’ve covered for years at BlogHer that this is not always the case…and that remains true to this day. But the women on this panel are representing such affinity communities and are making the case that there is a huge opportunity…for them, their communities, and for brands.

So how can/should marketers reach out to LGBT parents online? Do you feel, like I often do, that much parenting-focused advertising is targeted to non-LGBT families, while much LGBT advertising is targeted to single gay men? And how can marketers reach us without us feeling like we’re being exploited just so they can make a buck? Share your thoughts in the comments, and I’ll share them at BlogHer.