LGBT Parenting Roundup

Lots of news this week in addition to the overturning of the Florida adoption ban.

Scholarly Stuff

  • I’m not the only one thinking about known donors and three-parent families. Lawyer Ari Ezra Waldman takes a look at some of the same cases I mentioned plus a few others.
  • Sociologist Philip N. Cohen writes at HuffPo about the Florida decision and about a recent study (which I wrote about here) that found children of same-sex parents make normal progress in school. The piece is notable for use of the terms homogamous and heterogamous, “trying to advance better language that avoids the term opposite-sex for men and women, who differ by degrees—and doesn’t presume men and women married to each other are heterosexual.” The terms also take the emphasis off “sex”—not a bad thing in terms of seeing queer people as more than just what we do in bed. I like them; what do you think?
  • A new study by Arlene Istar Lev, Professor at the SUNY Albany school of Social Welfare, in the journal Family Process, “[questions] the heterosexism that pressures LGBTQ parents to prove their success as parents by producing heterosexual (read: normal) children. The research, steeped in heterosexist and heteronormative beliefs, assumes that if the children of LGBTQ people are gay or transgender themselves, it is a problem, a ‘failure’—revealing the ongoing bias against LGBTQ people.” Lev notes that while most children of LGBTQ parents are heterosexual, some are not, and says, “Gay parents (just like heterosexual parents) may struggle with having gay or transgender children, in a part because they identify with the obstacles their children will face, and in part because of the societal pressure they feel to raise ‘normal’ (read: straight) children.” It’s an aspect of LGBT parenting not often discussed—but it needs to be. Good stuff.

Fun Stuff

  • Bay Windows columnist Jeff Epperley reflects on “Out in the Park,” the annual LGBT gathering at Six Flags New England, and the “remarkable . . . presence of so many children who seemed so happy to be surrounded by so many LGBT adults who not only seemed quite adept at having fun themselves in large numbers (without a police officer or drunken fistfight in sight), but who also seemed so ready to shower on kids the kind of attention that makes kids feel special in ways that kids need to feel as much as possible.”
  • Those in the Massachusetts area may want to attend Plimoth Plantation’s third annual Out at Plimoth Plantation day this Saturday. Lectures on 17th-century LGBT history as well as lots of LGBT families running around. What could be more fun? (Confession: I’m a history geek.) I have more on the event at Change.org.

School Stuff

  • The Durham News reports on the “Proud Apple Social Club,” formed by LGBT teachers in North Carolina, and on local LGBT-inclusive safe schools efforts.
  • Columnist Dan Savage has launched a YouTube channel to send messages of hope to bullied LGBT youth. “It gets better,” he tells them. (Via Towleroad.)
  • The Maine Human Rights Commission found that Orono Middle School unlawfully discriminated against a transgender sixth-grader by forcing the student to use a gender-neutral bathroom.
  • GLSEN has released its 2009 National School Climate Survey. The study of 7,261 middle and high school students found that nearly 9 out of 10 LGBT students experienced harassment at school in the past year and nearly two-thirds felt unsafe because of their sexual orientation. Nearly a third of LGBT students skipped at least one day of school in the past month because of safety concerns. Things that helped? Having a Gay Straight Alliance (GSA) and an anti-bullying policy with specific protections based on sexual orientation and/or gender identity/expression.

Political Stuff

  • Florida wasn’t the only state to see an advance in LGBT parenting rights this week. A new law in New York permits unmarried partners, including same-sex ones, to adopt children jointly, and also substitutes the gender-neutral term “married couple” in the adoption statute for “husband and wife.” New York will recognize marriages of same-sex couples from other jurisdictions, although it does not enact such marriages.
  • Israel’s Ministry of Social Affairs has published data showing the number of same-sex families who adopted children has doubled during the past year. New regulations allow women to enact second-parent adoptions; Social Affairs Minister Isaac Herzog says he plans to introduce a policy that would allow men to adopt children born through surrogacy who are the biological children of their partners.

Personal Stuff

Other Stuff

  • The New York Times has a fascinating article on the not uncommon Afghan practice of parents encouraging their girls to live as boys, because of “economic need, social pressure to have sons, and in some cases, a superstition that doing so can lead to the birth of a real boy.”
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