Comments on: Family Voices XVII: LGBT Grandparents http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/ Sustenance for Lesbian Moms Thu, 09 Feb 2012 20:39:45 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Steve Silverman http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-80469 Steve Silverman Fri, 19 Sep 2008 19:57:08 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-80469 I have known Karen (the pre Karen and the current Karen) since 1964 at least. 30 years passed in what seemed like a heart beat since I had last seen her and it was like being with the old gang again. Whatever changes we all have made, she seemed like the same wild and wacky person as before. I guess that old expression, "You can't keep a good Mombian down" is true. I wonder what I would have thought back then??? Well, I just keep in mind that old German proverb, "Ve get olt soon und schmart late" and life will bring you Peace and understanding one day. May you be blessed with both. --Steve I have known Karen (the pre Karen and the current Karen) since 1964 at least. 30 years passed in what seemed like a heart beat since I had last seen her and it was like being with the old gang again. Whatever changes we all have made, she seemed like the same wild and wacky person as before. I guess that old expression, “You can’t keep a good Mombian down” is true. I wonder what I would have thought back then??? Well, I just keep in mind that old German proverb, “Ve get olt soon und schmart late” and life will bring you Peace and understanding one day. May you be blessed with both. –Steve

]]> By: Ren http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-80274 Ren Tue, 16 Sep 2008 19:28:59 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-80274 Thanks for this interview. I don't hear about a lot of trans/gender-variant parents or grandparents. It's always good to see that it's possible, that it might have unique joys as well as problems. Plus, it's great to read an interview that handles that facet of someone's story so matter-of-factly. Thanks for this interview. I don’t hear about a lot of trans/gender-variant parents or grandparents. It’s always good to see that it’s possible, that it might have unique joys as well as problems. Plus, it’s great to read an interview that handles that facet of someone’s story so matter-of-factly.

]]> By: Sharon Fitch http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-80096 Sharon Fitch Sun, 14 Sep 2008 14:07:31 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-80096 I have been friends with Pam and Karen (in her former life) since 1969. They remain dearest friends, loving, warm, precious, as they always have been. We are part of each others lives, across the kilometeres, and we continue this relationship with our respective children. There are some things that will not change, and that is true friendship. Thanks for your sharing, Karen. I have been friends with Pam and Karen (in her former life) since 1969. They remain dearest friends, loving, warm, precious, as they always have been. We are part of each others lives, across the kilometeres, and we continue this relationship with our respective children. There are some things that will not change, and that is true friendship. Thanks for your sharing, Karen.

]]> By: Dee Reynolds http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-80004 Dee Reynolds Sat, 13 Sep 2008 00:31:27 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-80004 Thank you, Karen for sharing such insight into your life! I had no idea of your struggles. You and Pam are an inspiration, not just to those with struggles like yours, but to us "normal?" people. Your words are always like poetry to me; and how blessed you are to have found your soul mate, Pam. She, too, is so very special. love to you both. Thank you, Karen for sharing such insight into your life! I had no idea of your struggles. You and Pam are an inspiration, not just to those with struggles like yours, but to us “normal?” people. Your words are always like poetry to me; and how blessed you are to have found your soul mate, Pam. She, too, is so very special. love to you both.

]]> By: Karen's son http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-79963 Karen's son Fri, 12 Sep 2008 02:21:56 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-79963 "Children have a knack of seeing through shams, especially when it involves their security. Children, like many autistics, can see through lies, deceit, deception, and insincerity. Be honest, be yourself, communicate with children at their level of understanding. Love always. Set limits. Provide security. Listen. And listen again." I'd like to second Dads remark. She always provided (and still does) unconditional love - especially when we disagree. As I told her when she 1st came out to me, it might take me a while to get used to it, but I'll always love her as my parent. Still weird hugging her and feeling a bra! :) but I'm getting used to it. She didn't push her change on me (ie she is who she is and she loves me for who I am, and she didn't expect everything to be normal right away), and let me get used to it on my own. I think that is something that helped immensely with our relationship - and a peice of advice I'd like to share to anyone coming out to loved ones. Come out, be honest, and be patient with those you love. Karen always taught me respect and tolerence is a two way street. “Children have a knack of seeing through shams, especially when it involves their security. Children, like many autistics, can see through lies, deceit, deception, and insincerity. Be honest, be yourself, communicate with children at their level of understanding. Love always. Set limits. Provide security. Listen. And listen again.”

I’d like to second Dads remark. She always provided (and still does) unconditional love – especially when we disagree. As I told her when she 1st came out to me, it might take me a while to get used to it, but I’ll always love her as my parent. Still weird hugging her and feeling a bra! :) but I’m getting used to it. She didn’t push her change on me (ie she is who she is and she loves me for who I am, and she didn’t expect everything to be normal right away), and let me get used to it on my own. I think that is something that helped immensely with our relationship – and a peice of advice I’d like to share to anyone coming out to loved ones. Come out, be honest, and be patient with those you love. Karen always taught me respect and tolerence is a two way street.

]]> By: cameron m http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-79906 cameron m Wed, 10 Sep 2008 23:12:16 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-79906 I met Karen and Pam while Square Dancing in Edmonton in 2002 (?). They're an amazing couple of people you'd ever wanna meet: both are caring, brilliant, witty, beautiful women. I'm glad Karen is here to still hold open the doors wide for the LGBT communities. She's an inspirational example to me. I met Karen and Pam while Square Dancing in Edmonton in 2002 (?). They’re an amazing couple of people you’d ever wanna meet: both are caring, brilliant, witty, beautiful women. I’m glad Karen is here to still hold open the doors wide for the LGBT communities. She’s an inspirational example to me.

]]> By: henrietta Fluster http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-79904 henrietta Fluster Wed, 10 Sep 2008 22:46:36 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-79904 thank you Karen is a very special and wonderful and wonderful person who has been a loving mamber of our family sincr she was in highschool Pams Mom thank you

Karen is a very special and wonderful and wonderful person who has been a loving mamber of our family sincr she was in highschool
Pams Mom

]]> By: Michael Connolly http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-79874 Michael Connolly Wed, 10 Sep 2008 13:33:34 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-79874 Thank you, Karen, for this wonderful interview, and Dana for organizing this series. Could we see photos of the grandkids, too? Thank you, Karen, for this wonderful interview, and Dana for organizing this series. Could we see photos of the grandkids, too?

]]> By: Candas http://www.mombian.com/2008/09/09/family-voices-xvii-lgbt-grandparents/comment-page-1/#comment-79856 Candas Wed, 10 Sep 2008 05:46:23 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/?p=2419#comment-79856 Knowing Karen, a loving and proud parent and grandparent, it's a joy to read her story -- and tragic to think that such a personal thing as gender can be meddled-in by a harsh society to the point that someone sees suicide as the only way out -- or that harassment and gang rape can be such a common response to difference. Thank goodness Karen survived to be with us and to be the strong, smart, delightful and solid person she is to her family, her community and her friends. Knowing Karen, a loving and proud parent and grandparent, it’s a joy to read her story — and tragic to think that such a personal thing as gender can be meddled-in by a harsh society to the point that someone sees suicide as the only way out — or that harassment and gang rape can be such a common response to difference. Thank goodness Karen survived to be with us and to be the strong, smart, delightful and solid person she is to her family, her community and her friends.

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