Teen’s Story of Life with Lesbian Moms Is a Winner

Morgan Aitken-Young, a 17-year-old resident of Fremont, California, won first place in the national Young Voices Foundation Short Story Contest with “Unequal,” a moving piece about life as the daughter of lesbian moms. The Palo Alto Daily News has more.

Her piece is more than a personal essay, however. She fictionalizes it so she can show the effects of homophobia on the protagonist and her lesbian friends throughout their lives, and does so with a maturity and command of dialogue that put many older writers to shame.

Another worthy read for today. If you have teens yourself, they may enjoy it, too. It is available as an MS Word doc on the Young Voices Foundation site.

Bronx Queer

Co-op City, The BronxWhich New York City borough has the highest percentage same-sex families with children? Those who know a bit about New York’s LGBT population might guess Manhattan, with traditional gay meccas Greenwich Village and Chelsea, or Brooklyn, with lesbian-filled Park Slope. According to a new report by the Williams Institute at UCLA, however, forty-nine percent of same-sex couples in the Bronx have children, more than any other borough.

The New York Times covered this in a lengthy article yesterday, relating that Manhattan has the most same-sex couples overall, 38 percent of the city total, but only 4 percent of them have children. In Brooklyn, 21 percent of same-sex couples are parents, in Queens, 22 percent, and on Staten Island, 29 percent. Read more »

Philanthropy and Family a Sweet Combination

Jen Rainin(Originally published with slight variation in Bay Windows.)

For Jen Rainin, creating a lesbian travel company based on the idea of giving back to the world was an extension of her role as a philanthropist, but also a way to convey positive values to her children. Rainin is one of the founders of Sweet, which will offer “voluntourism” vacations that combine fun and relaxation with opportunities for giving back to the communities they visit. Her co-founder and the company’s CEO, Shannon Wentworth, is a marketing executive with experience at established lesbian travel company Olivia, PlanetOut, and Care2, a social network for people who want to improve the world.

For Rainin, philanthropy is a way of life. Her primary job is as chair of the Kenneth Rainin Foundation established by her father, an entrepreneur who built a leading scientific instrument company. Now she is carrying on both his entrepreneurial and philanthropic traditions through Sweet. “I feel like if I didn’t share the good fortune that I’ve experienced in my life, then shame on me. With the foundation, I’m able to do that. Then Sweet came along and the idea that there will be even more opportunity for hands-on giving back really appealed,” she says.

As the mother of two young boys, part of the appeal for Rainin is also what this work can teach her children. She explains, “As a mom, a big part of my job is instilling values in my kids and trying to be a role model. What I’m doing is what I hope my kids will want to do in the future, to find something that they feel passionately about that really does make a positive difference in the world and pursue it with their whole hearts.” Read more »

What Are Your Best Baby Gear Ideas?

Nina over at Queercents is adopting a baby in December, and wrote today about her meltdown at Babies R Us and her concerns about what to get for her new arrival. She was kind enough to mention that she found my list of baby gear recommendations useful.

I wrote the list a few years back, and tried to keep it pretty basic, with suggestions for a broad spectrum of families, but I’ll be the first to say there are probably as many lists of baby gear as there are parents. Go leave some of your own ideas as comments on her post.

A recent, relevant article is “The Great Diaper Debate,” from this past Sunday’s Boston Globe Magazine. I’ve always taken a middling stance on the sometimes polarizing issue of cloth vs. disposable. I think there is not one universal answer, but depends on one’s specific practices and location. Do you use a diaper service (and how close is it), have an energy-efficient washer, use an environmentally friendly detergent, live in a drought-afflicted area, or buy bleach free and biodegradable disposables vs. the major brands? The Globe concurs:

Still, many parents who want to do what’s best for the environment aren’t getting the best information. While many blogs, books, and online forums extol the benefits of cloth diapers, helping parents feel good about choosing what they see as the greener option, the research shows surprisingly little evidence supporting one over the other.

Which means it is up to parents to weigh the costs - in time, money, energy, and pollution - and decide whether cloth or paper diapers are right for their baby. For some, it’s an equation with ever-changing variables.

“An equation with ever-changing variables.” I think that could describe most of parenting, in fact. Best of luck to Nina and anyone else about to become a parent!

Banned Books Week

Banned Books WeekIt’s Banned Books Week once again, the American Library Association’s annual celebration of the freedom to read.

Each year, the ALA tracks the books that have received an official challenge, “a formal, written complaint, filed with a library or school requesting that materials be removed because of content or appropriateness.” Judith F. Krug, director of the ALA’s Office for Intellectual Freedom, notes, however, that for each reported challenge, four or five remain unreported.

And Tango Makes Three, about two male penguins who raise a chick together, has topped the list of challenged books for each of the past two years (2006 and 2007; 2008 data will be published after the end of the year). Looking at all the years between 2000 and 2007, the most challenged books were the Harry Potter volumes, apparently because of their promotion of witchcraft. May a blast-ended skrewt hide under the beds of those who spout such nonsense, I say.

At the same time, Huckleberry Finn also makes the list, because some objected to the book’s racial stereotypes and use of the “n word.” I’m against both of those things—but my feeling is that as parents, we have to convey our values to our children well enough that they can identify and reject concepts and actions that don’t correspond to them. We can’t just shield them from every instance of something that conflicts with those values, especially in public settings.

What say you? Is public censorship ever justified?

I’ll have more on banned books throughout the week. Stay tuned.

The Sarah Palin Cocktail

Lipstick glassFor those of you watching the presidential debate tonight, I offer up a libation for your consideration—the Sarah Palin Cocktail:

Lipstick on the rim, but nothing inside.

Naw. I’m going for something stronger. I think I’ll need it. I might also invite some friends to bring over their favorite ingredients so we can create a community-organized Chicago deep-dish pizza in honor of the junior senator from Illinois.

How will you celebrate the debate?

Weekly Political Update

  • The ACLU won a federal court decision that ruled discrimination against a transgender person constitutes per se sex discrimination in violation of Title VII. Nan Hunter at Bilerico has further analysis of what this means for ENDA, and warns that it is a trial-level court decision, which the Justice Department is likely to appeal.
  • The Senate Committee on Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs, chaired by Sen. Joe Lieberman (I-CT), heard arguments on legislation to provide same-sex domestic partners of federal employees the same benefits as spouses of straight employees. Leaders of the two largest federal employee unions, among others, expressed strong support for the bill. Lieberman expressed hope about passing it, although Howard C. Weizmann, deputy director of the U.S. Office of Personnel Management, said his agency is opposed. Author and lawyer Nancy Polikoff, while supportive of same-sex partner benefits, raised the very good question of why the bill doesn’t cover all family configurations.
  • Rumors are circulating that Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice was John McCain’s first pick as VP, but was eliminated because of rumors she is a lesbian. Rice jointly owned a house and held a line of credit with filmmaker Randy Bean. The unnamed source said, “Whether or not her relationship with Bean means Condi is light in the loafers is not the point.” Someone should tell this person, however, that “light in the loafers” is an appellation for gay men. We lesbians stand firm in our comfortable footwear.

Read more »

LGBT Parenting Roundup

Because the financial bailout isn’t the only thing happening this week:

  • Ten-year-old Kira Findling of Sebastopol, California, wrote “Please Let My Moms Be Married,” a moving plea to vote no on Prop. 8, for the Press Democrat newspaper.
  • A new report by the nonpartisan Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute in New York concludes that gay men and lesbians are an important part of the pool of potential adoptive parents, and should be judged on their qualifications, not sexual orientation. The report cites the previous statistic that a national ban on adoption by gay men and lesbians could add $87-130 million to foster care system expenditures each year.
  • The PepsiCo Foundation has given a grant of $500,000 to PFLAG (Parents, Family and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) to support their national education campaign, Straight for Equality, and for training and chapter support.
  • County social workers and several private adoption agencies in Westchester County, New York will meet this week with same-sex couples and single people who are considering kids. 900 children in Westchester County are in need of homes.
  • The Miami Herald profiles the two men who became the first same-sex couple to adopt a child in Florida.

Read more »

“She Got Me Pregnant”: Episode 44

Helen and I take to the great outdoors this week. Helen talks about her love of compost and gets picky about her choice of pitchforks, I imitate an earthworm, and we bring you a green idea for the fall that gives your kids something to play in while it helps clean up your yard.


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Second Giveaway of Giggles Software for Babies

Giggles Computer Funtime for BabyThis is my second giveaway of a set of Giggles Computer Funtime for Baby software by Leveractive. Babies can hit any key on the keyboard to interact with the software and trigger various animations and other fun but age-appropriate actions. See my post about the first giveaway for more on the software and this LGBT-friendly company.

The software will go to the first person who leaves a comment with the correct answer to the following question. Please note rules and restrictions below. Read more »

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