Comments on: National Adoption Month: For the Good of the Children http://www.mombian.com/2007/11/01/national-adoption-month-for-the-good-of-the-children/ Sustenance for Lesbian Moms Thu, 09 Feb 2012 20:39:45 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: Mark Diebel http://www.mombian.com/2007/11/01/national-adoption-month-for-the-good-of-the-children/comment-page-1/#comment-72927 Mark Diebel Fri, 02 Nov 2007 00:47:06 +0000 http://www.mombian.com/2007/11/01/national-adoption-month-for-the-good-of-the-children/#comment-72927 "Families who adopt show the generous spirit of our Nation. Every child desires a permanent home, and when parents adopt a child to love as their own, lives are forever changed. For parents, the decision to adopt a child is among life’s greatest and happiest turning points." Comment here from an adult adoptee who observes also that lives are forever changed before any parent adopts a child. The mom (and dad) who had the child are forever changed when they relinquished their parental rights (assuming the process proceeded in a linear fashion); the child's life is changed when he/she left the familiar surroundings of womb and family for an unknown and strange world. Adoption may indeed for a while be an extremely happy moment. It quickly becomes an event of duration in which much wisdom, in addition to love, is necessary for all involved to integrate the complexities of this twist of fate and decision. As an adoptee, as much as I did indeed love my adopting parents (they are now deceased), I really hated that I was adopted. I was also pained in that my experience was something very hard to communicate with my parents and community because of the myth surrounding it that it is such a "happy" thing. It has taken me almost fifty years of living in order to begin to come to terms with the reality of this life. I think that the GLBT communities would be sensitive to experiences of living in view of what I perceive their group and individual experiences to have been. “Families who adopt show the generous spirit of our Nation. Every child desires a permanent home, and when parents adopt a child to love as their own, lives are forever changed. For parents, the decision to adopt a child is among life’s greatest and happiest turning points.”

Comment here from an adult adoptee who observes also that lives are forever changed before any parent adopts a child. The mom (and dad) who had the child are forever changed when they relinquished their parental rights (assuming the process proceeded in a linear fashion); the child’s life is changed when he/she left the familiar surroundings of womb and family for an unknown and strange world.

Adoption may indeed for a while be an extremely happy moment. It quickly becomes an event of duration in which much wisdom, in addition to love, is necessary for all involved to integrate the complexities of this twist of fate and decision.

As an adoptee, as much as I did indeed love my adopting parents (they are now deceased), I really hated that I was adopted. I was also pained in that my experience was something very hard to communicate with my parents and community because of the myth surrounding it that it is such a “happy” thing. It has taken me almost fifty years of living in order to begin to come to terms with the reality of this life.

I think that the GLBT communities would be sensitive to experiences of living in view of what I perceive their group and individual experiences to have been.

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