How Wide Was the Stance on that Peacock?

peacock.jpgFirst penguins, then swans and flamingos—now peacocks. A headline-making British baronet, Sir Benjamin Slade, claims his pet peacock is gay, causing the bird to claw a visitor’s Lexus in a fit of passion:

“It started when he fell in love with this Lexus, which was in a very distinct peacock blue and looked like another peacock boy,” he said.

“He couldn’t control his urges and tried to shag it. He attacked the panels so hard that the car needs a total respray.”

Is this love or simply a male bird being territorial? As most of us know, just because a guy is a flashy dresser and likes to display his tail doesn’t make him gay. Besides, if the bird was in love, wouldn’t he have invited the Lexus in for a romantic evening watching La Cage aux Folles before making his move? (If things worked out, the peacock could apply to Lexus’ corporation, Toyota, for domesticated partner benefits.)

Still, I’m happy to welcome the flamboyant fowl into the ranks of queer avians (“gayvians”—you heard it here first), if only as an honorary member. Of course, it would be more fun if we had evidence of lesbian boobies.

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