Tax Benefits of Being a Parent

Allison Einbinder of Queercents has written an informative post on the tax benefits of being a parent. Did you know that if you finalized an adoption in 2006, you may be eligible for an adoption credit of $10,960 for the 2006 tax year? Or that you can deduct expenses such as temporary storage of both eggs and sperm? It almost makes up for the cost of all those diapers and gallons of milk and soccer cleats. Read Allison’s post for the details.

Another Quote for Women’s History Month

Women’s History Month is coming to a close, but I wanted to make sure I included the poem “Heroines” by poet and lesbian icon Adrienne Rich in my series of quotes about women and history. I am cutting here for purposes of length and copyright, but that is doing some injustice to Rich’s work. I urge you to find either of her works in which the poem appears, A Wild Patience Has Taken Me This Far or The Fact of a Doorframe, and read the whole thing:

Exceptional/even deviant/you draw your long skirts
across the nineteenth century/Your mind
burns long after death/not like the harbor beacon
but like a pyre of driftwood/on the beach/You are spared
illiteracy/death by pneumonia/teeth which leave the gums
the seamstress’ clouded eyes/the mill-girl’s shortening breath
by a collection/of circumstances/soon to be known as
class privilege/The law says you can possess nothing/in a world
where property is everything . . . .
You draw your long skirts/deviant/across the nineteenth century
registering injustice/failing to make it whole
How can I fail to love/your clarity and fury
how can I give you/all your due/take courage from your courage
honor your exact/legacy as it is
recognizing/as well/that it is not enough?

Lesbian Mother Asks for Ban on Second-Parent Adoption

A lesbian mother has asked the Georgia Supreme Court to rule that second-parent adoptions are illegal. Sara Wheeler and her partner had started a family together, with Sara carrying the child and her partner Missy Wheeler adopting him. The two later split, and Sara would not let Missy see their son. Sara asked the county court to throw out the adoption they had previously legalized, claiming it contradicted state law. The case was rejected, and then thrown out by the appeals court and state Supreme Court as well. Sara Wheeler is now asking the Supreme Court to reconsider.

The LGBT community in Atlanta is reportedly up in arms about the case, and Lambda Legal has filed a brief in support of Missy Wheeler. I feel a similar sense of disgust and outrage, but also a sense of “here we go again.” I wrote at the end of January about two similar cases, one in Ohio and one debated between Vermont and Virginia, in which the bio mothers used anti-LGBT laws to try and deny custody to their former partners. Read the rest of this post »

Weekend Sports Update

The big news in lesbian sports this week was the resignation of non-lesbian Rene Portland, head coach of the women’s basketball team at Penn State. Her departure was ostensibly voluntarily, but it’s no great leap to think it had something to do with years of questions, investigations, and lawsuits (one championed by the National Center for Lesbian Rights) about how she treated lesbian players and players she deemed not “feminine” enough. Some may say she left the Lady Lions many years too late, but the fact she did so at all speaks to a growing awareness of lesbian inclusiveness as a necessary component of women’s sports programs, if not university programs as a whole. Michelle Voepel at ESPN.com and Scribegrrrl at After Ellen have more of the story. (On a personal note, I’ll add that one of the benefits of going to a women’s college is that your team is never called the “Lady” anythings. People would find it silly if the Penn State men’s team were called the “Gentlemen Lions,” yes?)

On a more positive note for women’s basketball, Read the rest of this post »

Science Wallpaper for Kids (and Adults)

My laptop experienced a fatal error yesterday that required a complete mindwipe and restore. Luckily, we have more computers than creatures in our house (even counting the cats), so it didn’t affect my blogging. Twice lucky, I’d just done a backup, so it didn’t affect my sanity. As I sat watching a repeat of last week’s L Word and reinstalling everything, I surfed over to the NASA site to grab an image for my desktop wallpaper. This started me on a roll of looking for other science-related, non-commercial wallpaper, which I now present to you, dear readers, for yourselves or your offspring.

• Images from the Hubble Space Telescope showcase a shining array of star clusters, galaxies, nebulae, and planets. Images from the less well known Chandra X-Ray Observatory are equally spectacular. The Chandra team also made screensavers with them.
• The National Zoo offers photos of their famous pandas as well as other animals. The Birmingham and Denver Zoos (among others) also have great images, with Denver emphasizing baby animals.
• Several departments and programs of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) have their own wallpaper pages. Try the National Marine Sanctuaries, Stellwegen Bank National Marine Sanctuary, and Ocean Explorer.

Many of the sites also have online games, downloadable coloring and activity sheets, and much more to educate and entertain. Good for poking around on a rainy day.

Weekly Political Roundup

• Representative John Conyers (D-Mich.) introduced a federal hate-crimes bill that expands the definition of such crimes to include those based on sexual orientation. A similar bill is expected soon in the Senate. The recent gay bashing and death of 72-year-old Andrew Athos in Detroit is a tragic reminder of the need for such a law.
• An Illinois House Committee passed legislation to legalize civil unions. It now goes to the House floor.
• An Indiana House committee heard hours of opposing arguments, but did not vote on a constitutional amendment to ban same-sex marriage. One sticking point is whether the bill would prohibit companies from offering domestic partner benefits to same-sex couples or halt domestic violence protection for any unmarried couple. Three of the state’s largest employers spoke against the amendment, saying “We want to send a message that Indiana is a welcoming state to any talented person.” Read the rest of this post »

Online Games for Early Reading Skills

My son is in the throes of pre-reading mania. He reads letters on everything from milk cartons to street signs to his vitamin tablets. He points to the words on a book cover and moves his finger along, saying the title. He’s not actually reading it yet; it doesn’t work if he doesn’t know the title in advance. Still, the connection is there, and I’m sure it’s only a matter of time.

One site I’ve been using to encourage his budding skills is Starfall.com. I forget who suggested it to me, but I’m glad someone did. Read the rest of this post »

Book Review: Policy Issues Affecting Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Families

Originally published in Bay Windows, March 22, 2007.)

Policy Issues Affecting Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Families sounds like the kind of book that gathers dust on the shelves of politicians and policy wonks. Sean Cahill, Director of the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force (NGLTF) Policy Institute, and Sarah Tobias, who has been a Senior Policy Analyst at the Demos think tank, have in fact written a compact, readable analysis of the major issues affecting LGBT families today. It belongs in the homes of anyone with even a small claim to interest in these matters. Read the rest of this post »

The L Word Season Four, Episode Eleven: The Parenting Perspective

Last week’s episode featured the clever parenting trick of using code words to deceive your children. This week, we see yet another childhood staple—kids plotting with one parent to deceive the other. It’s not as evil as it sounds—I’m talking about surprise birthday presents here, not anything with malicious intent.

Shane conspires with Paige’s son Jared to throw her a surprise birthday party. Shane does the planning; Jared uses the “let’s go to the Planet for french fries” ruse with Paige. (And no, Shane isn’t really Jared’s parent, but she’s dating his mom, so we’ll consider her in loco parentis for birthday purposes.) It’s sweet, though Paige’s naivité is a little unbelievable. Maybe it was just my family, but we used to do this sort of thing to each other all the time when I was growing up, and our plots had to get increasingly complex each year as suspicions grew. (Other than that, we were an honest, trusting family.)

I also have to comment on Paige’s easy acceptance of Jared’s request for french fries, after last week’s episode showed her allowing ice cream for breakfast. It was a special occasion then, too—but I’m hoping Jared’s eating lots of green and leafy vegetables at other times.

This coming Sunday is the season finale. I’m waiting to see if it shows Bette or Tina actually having to reschedule something in their lives because it’s the nanny’s night off.

Scribegrrrl at AfterEllen has the full recap.

Happy Birthday, Rosie!

Today is Rosie O’Donnell’s birthday, and I want to wish her all the best. Always outspoken, often controversial, she is nevertheless a champion of LGBT families and children in general, and one of the most visible lesbian moms in the U.S. Love her or hate her, she’s one of us.

I can’t condone everything she’s ever said or done, but I can recognize the good. Here’s a link to her For All Kids Foundation, dedicated to “[helping] young, at-risk, underserved children and their families out of poverty.” It would be nice if the media focused a little more attention on this rather than her feud with Donald Trump.