I love my son’s Music Together class, as I’ve written before. Not only is it great for the kids, but it encourages us parents to participate in our children’s musical exploration, sharing drums, bells, scarves, shakers, and anything else that makes a sound or marks a rhythm. In how many other places would you find a 40-something straight man asking his son for a silk scarf, saying “I need a scarf. I can’t dance without a scarf”?

Our teacher has lots of good ideas for helping young children learn basic musical skills. Some are things we find ourselves doing naturally, but being aware of them as learning tools helps us do them more deliberately. Here are a few of the simplest:

• Physical touch–tapping on your child, holding her and swaying, etc.–helps instill a sense of rhythm.
• Even before they can speak, children will “sing” with sounds. Different children use different sounds: “la, la, la,” “da, da, da,” “ay, ay, ay,” “oo, oo, oo,” etc. Listen for what your child does, and reinforce it by “singing” back to her using the same sound.
• In a similar vein, let your child lead when using instruments. If you give him a drumstick and a drum, but he wants to beat the stick on the floor, tap along on the floor with your own stick. The point is not to teach your toddler how to play the drum, but rather how to enjoy music and feel good about his own actions.
• It doesn’t take expensive or even store-bought instruments to make a good band. As most of us know, pots, pans, and wooden spoons are just as attractive for budding musicians. A handful of small dried pasta shapes in a tightly lidded sippy cup makes a great shaker. (If you want more ideas for how to make music with everyday objects, Sesame Street’s Let’s Make Music video, featuring the percussion troupe Stomp, is a great inspiration.)

• Florida’s Senate tabled a bill that would have granted adoption rights to same-sex couples.
• A Missouri Circuit Court has granted foster-parenting rights to a lesbian couple. It is unclear whether the state will appeal the ruling.
• New Jersey’s Supreme Court heard arguments on behalf of couples claiming that denial of marriage rights to same-sex couples is unconstitutional. It is unknown when the state will make its ruling.
• In New York, the State Appellate Court rejected the argument that same-sex marriage is unconstitutional. Despite the setback, the Empire State Pride Agenda notes that they always expected this would ultimately be decided by the state’s highest court. The issue is in fact already before it, because of an earlier appellate decision from a different department.

Finally, some thoughts on how we’re framing the debate. Steve at Adamant Sun notes perceptively that much of the disconnect between those for and those against LGBT rights has to do with whether or not one views being gay is a choice. Those who view being gay as a choice will approach the whole matter of gay rights, hate speech, etc. from a completely different set of assumptions.

Iowa governor Tom Vilsack also chips in his two cents this week, making what I call the “Britney argument” in favor of same-sex marriage, saying “I personally don’t think that it is fair . . . for Britney Spears, who was married for 51 hours to some guy in Las Vegas (for) that guy (to have) more rights than someone who’s been committed to another person for 25 years.” (Thanks to the Gay & Lesbian Leadership SmartBrief for the heads-up.)

I’ve been a total Olympic junkie this week. While I’ll watch any athletes, regardless of parental status, I’ve noticed that moms are doing well for themselves in these games.

Swiss skeleton racer Maya Pederson, who won the 2005 World Championships only a year after giving birth, won gold in the event in Torino. Norwegian cross-country skier Hilde Petersen is not only the mother of twins, but also the oldest woman, at 41 1/2, to medal in a Winter Olympics, taking bronze in the 10K Classical race. Her 16-year-old girls ski as well, and have raced with their mom in relays. Petersen credits her daughters with motivating her to keep racing, despite her age. She and daughter Ida even won bronze at last year’s Norwegian championships.

Other moms competing in cross-country skiing, the most grueling endurance event of the Winter Games, include Russia’s Yulia Tchepalova and the Czech Republic’s Katerina Neumannova. My partner and I went two times around our local park after this past weekend’s snowfall, and I have the fullest respect for those who do this farther, faster, and without stopping to blow their noses every ten minutes.

Finally, a word of acknowledgement to all the moms who don’t compete, but support their children who do. There should be a special medal for that.

Scientific American reports today on research claiming that babies as young as seven months have an inherent sense of number. The scientists found that when infants hear someone saying “Look” either two or three times, they will chose to spend more time looking at a video displaying the matching number of faces, rather than one with a different number.

Next they’ll be finding that three-year-olds have an inherent sense of differential equations.

It’s Valentine’s Day, and all I can think about (well, until my partner comes home) are the two court cases, one today and one tomorrow, that could have a tremendous impact on LGBT families. In Florida today, the Senate Committee on Children and Families is voting on whether to permit adoption by same-sex parents. Heart-wrenching stories like that of Franke Alexandre underscore why this is good for children, parents, and our society. Farther north, the New Jersey Supreme Court will hear a case tomorrow to determine if banning same-sex marriage is unconstitutional.

It’s not about religion. It’s not about politics. It’s about love.

Adoptive Family magazine has a good article on how to deal with insensitive comments relatives may make about adopted children. They recommend that you:

• Appoint yourself ambassador of adoption.
• “Immunize” yourself before family encounters.
• Do a background check [with other relatives, not the FBI] on problematic relatives.
• Hold your ground firmly but with compassion.

Much of their advice makes good sense for LGBT parents in general, whether or not you’re an adoptive parent. Too many of us still have to cope with intractable or insensitive relatives. Read the full article for more details on how to cope.

Does anyone else find it disturbing that the motto of Goldfish crackers is “The Snack that Smiles Back?” I’m sorry, but vegetarian or not, I don’t want my food smiling at me. (Actually, at our house we’re partial to Annie’s Cheddar Bunnies when it comes to snack crackers. Cute and bunny shaped, but they don’t grin at us.)

New Jersey could shortly be the second state to legalize same-sex marriage, and the first to do so through the judiciary rather than the legislature. Lambda Legal’s groundbreaking case, Lewis v. Harris, will go before the state Supreme Court next Tuesday at 10:00 a.m. Garden State Equality, New Jersey’s LGBT-rights group, will be holding a rally in Montclair, NJ the night before and gathering outside the Supreme Court building in Trenton during the case. See their Web site for details.

Although a judiciary is less likely than a legislature to be swayed by public opinion, a Garden State Equality-Zogby poll conducted last year offered promising results. It found that “61-33%, voters oppose idea of state constitutional ban on gay marriage, want legislature to accept what courts rule.”

As a one-time resident of the Garden State, with friends still there, I will be watching this case even more closely than I do other states’ same-sex marriage developments. It’s a fitting event for Freedom to Marry Week, and one that will hopefully give us a reason to celebrate.

A little off-topic, but I dare say I’m not the only dyke looking forward to the Winter Olympics that start tomorrow. While the sports I personally play tend not to involve ice and snow (though I’ve been known to cross-country ski on occasion), I’m still going to be glued to the TV for two weeks. (Well, when I’m not at my son’s playgroups.) Something about those speed skaters. . . .

The Human Rights Campaign is asking people to write to their members of Congress and urge them not to cosponsor or vote for the “Marriage Protection Amendment,” a renamed version of the “Federal Marriage Amendment” defeated in 2004. They explain:

This week, the American Family Association alerted their members to expect a vote in the Senate in early March on the Marriage Protection Amendment, formerly known as the Federal Marriage Amendment. In late January, anti-gay Senator Rick Santorum (R-Penn) stated, “I have asked the leader to hold a vote on defining marriage as the union of one man and one woman. The intention is to bring up the Allard constitutional amendment.” Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist has promised the radical right wing groups a vote in the U.S. Senate this year.

I needn’t tell most readers of this blog how vital it is for the legal and financial protection of our families that we defeat this proposed amendment. It’s insanely easy to contact your U. S. Senators and Representatives online, so please do so now, urging them to keep the Constitution free from discrimination.