With increasing coverage of LGBT parents in the media today, it is surprising LGBT grandparents are still largely invisible. I suspect this has much to do with the frequent media focus on lesbian couples with cute little tots or funny stories about finding sperm, or, for occasional variety, gay men searching for surrogates. The idea that LGBT people have been having kids long enough to become grandparents is foreign to most people, as is the concept of anyone coming out after having kids.

Alice Fisher and Michael Connolly of the Stonewall Communities Lifelong Learning Institute, the first LGBT LLI in the world, hope to change that. They ran a course in 2007 for LGBT grandparents, and wrote up their experiences for this month’s The Older LEARNer, a publication of the American Society on Aging. They discuss the changing role of grandparents in today’s society as well as particular issues for LGBT grandparents. One positive excerpt:

For the most part, we have not found the issue of how and when to come out to grandchildren to be a big issue for the youngest generation. We are open and low-key. . . . Grandchildren help choose—or invent—terms of endearment for the nonbiological grandparent. Can grandchildren keep track of five or seven grandparents? Yes, we found. Better than we can.

It’s a good article on a topic that deserves more recognition. I’ll be bringing you more voices of LGBT grandparents, in cooperation with Stonewall Communities, in the coming weeks. Stay tuned.

A reader just wrote to ask me if I knew of any LGBT-inclusive children’s books in Spanish, especially for the very youngest tots. She knew of Antonio’s Card/La Tarjeta de Antonio, by Rigoberto Gonzalez and Cecilia Alvarez, but felt that was a little beyond the age of her own child.

I’ll add the bilingual English/Spanish Best Best Colors: Los mejores colores, by Eric Hoffman and Celeste Henriquez, but that, too, is more of a preschool/early elementary book rather than a toddler book. The classic Heather Has Two Mommies, again for the same age range, also exists as Paula tiene dos mamas, but I’ve never liked Heather as a starter book for kids since it focuses on a child being teased about her family. That’s important to explain at some point, but can also create fears where there were none.

For toddlers (and up), all I could find was Todd Parr’s It’s Okay to Be Different in Spanish as Esta Bien Ser Diferente. The book is not LGBT-specific, but includes depictions of two moms and two dads with the captions (in the English version) “It’s okay to have different Moms [Dads].”

This is a pretty meager showing. Anyone know of any other Spanish-language children’s books (originals or translations from another language) that are LGBT-inclusive? Although my reader was interested in ones for toddlers, leave a comment if you know of any for any age child.

Lest you think I’ve become entirely obsessed with the Olympics (almost, but not quite), here’s a roundup of what’s happening in LGBT parenting news:

• The California Supreme Court ruled today that a group of doctors cannot use their religion as a legal excuse for denying a lesbian patient infertility treatment. Lambda Legal reports, “In a unanimous decision, the justices ruled that Guadalupe ‘Lupita’ Benitez was entitled to be treated like other patients with her same health problem, and that constitutional protections for religious liberty do not excuse unlawful discrimination.”
• Conservative activists gathered outside a California high school to rally support for Proposition 8, which would ban marriage of same-sex couples. They are apparently upset that the state’s Teachers Association donated $250,000 to fight the ban.
• Canada.com has a good interview with the mother of a trans son, in which she says, “I haven’t lost a daughter. I have gained a confident, strong level-headed son of whom I am immensely proud.” The article also mentions Families In TRANSition: A Resource Guide for Parents of Trans Youth (PDF link), which seems similar in spirit to The Transgender Child: A Handbook for Families and Professionals, which I reviewed last month, albeit with a Canadian bent.
• The U.K’s Guardian looks at some of the different approaches to transgender children who want to transition.

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My love of both Legos and the Olympicsis well documented. My son is also obsessed with the former and learning to love the latter.

I was thrilled, therefore, to see this astounding recreation of the Beijing Olympic facilities in Legos, including the Bird’s Nest, the Water Cube, the beach volleyball court, the equestrian arena, and more. (More photos here, including cutaways that show how they did the patterns in the walls of the Water Cube.)

Show this to your kids and hear them say “Wow!” (Then quickly explain why you can’t run out to the nearest Lego store and buy them enough bricks to do it themselves.)

(Thanks, Slashdot.)

Oksana Chusovitina, a 33-year-old German gymnast and mother, won silver last night in the Women’s Vault, proving her presence there wasn’t just a fluke.

I wrote about Chusovitina in a previous post (and Helen and I discussed in our vlog)—she kept competing past the “normal” age in order to raise money for her son’s leukemia treatments. NBC has a good interview with her in which she talks about her son’s illness, his status today, and what it was like switching citizenship from Uzbekistan to Germany in order to get medical care for him.

I also have to say it’s refreshing to see a female gymnast free of the eyeshadow and glitter that seems endemic in the sport. Let’s judge them by their skills and not by their makeup.

Congratulations to Chusovitina, and best wishes for her son’s continued good health.

Forty-one-year-old mother Dara Torres won two silver medals last night, bringing her count to three for the Beijing Games. Her first was in the Women’s 50m Freestyle, where she missed gold by one one-hundredth of a second. The second was in the 4×100 Medley Relay, where she anchored the team and closed, but did not make up, a deficit against Australia.

Both races set new American records. The relay team broke the previous world record, although not by as much as the winning Australians.

Just to keep things in perspective, though: Teammate Kara Lynn Joyce told the New York Times of a locker-room conversation with Torres: “She said swimming was tough, but she thought childbirth was tougher.”

When asked by an NBC reporter what she would someday tell her two-year-old daughter about this day, Torres replied, “I’ll tell her you don’t have to put an age limit on your dreams.”

Congratulations to Torres and all of the older athletes at these Games. (See my post last week on a few of them.)

A few weeks ago I reported on the first challenge to Uncle Bobby’s Wedding, a children’s book featuring two gay guinea pigs who marry.

Today, library director James LaRue, who wrote a sensitive, balanced response to the initial challenge, reports that a second patron has challenged the book and asked for its removal from the Douglas County Libraries in Colorado. The new patron argued that “the topic of a gay wedding is inappropriate because same sex marriage is illegal in 48 states, and specifically, in Colorado.” She also said “she knows at least 100 people ready to fill out a petition against the book.”

LaRue wrote back to point out that the setting of Uncle Bobby’s Wedding is unknown, so we don’t know if it occurs in a place where marriage of same-sex couples is illegal. He also stressed that it would be impossible for librarians to be familiar with all Colorado laws and to review each potential library acquisition to determine if any of the characters violate those laws. He explains:

Thousands and thousands of our books feature true or fictional tales of murder, robbery, kidnapping – all of which violate Colorado laws. . . . The story of Robin Hood, in which a thief and robber is regarded as a hero, would also be forbidden.” I concluded that the principle, in general, would be impossible for libraries to apply.

LaRue then offered to meet with the woman and the 100 people who agree with her. He notes that while she views this as a matter of a library advocating for a perspective she opposes, he says “it’s about the role of the public library as common and neutral ground, as a steward of public funds to represent all of the public. It’s a fair topic, and certainly deserving of community discussion.”

He also said the woman could appeal his decision to the library Board, or submit the petition and let him respond to it. He views this as an organized effort, but says, “I don’t know yet where it goes from here.”

Trying to ban books because the fictional characters do something that violates state law? I’d like to think any court would see this for the absurdity that it is. I’m realistic enough, though, to bet that this is going to be a nasty fight. I’ll keep you posted as the story develops.

Helen and I have been watching the Olympics all night. Dara Torres just won her heat in the Women’s 50m freestyle. Before the race, she went over and spoke with one of the officials, an action that puzzled the announcers until they realized she was asking them to hold the race so Swedish competitor Therese Alshammar could change out of a torn swimsuit.

The announcers were falling all over themselves praising her sportsmanship. They have a point. Torres herself told an interviewer later, “In the pool we’re competitors; out of the pool we’re friends.” True enough; but then any of the other swimmers could have asked the officials to wait. What made Torres do so?

Just then Helen looked over at me and explained it all very simply: “She’s a mom.”

• Many LGBT advocates are praising this year’s Democratic platform (not yet public) as “the most progressive major party platform with respect to LGBT issues in the nation’s history.” Some complaint that it never uses the terms “gay,” “lesbian,” “bisexual,” and “transgender,” but others argue that terms such as “same-sex couples” “sexual orientation,” and “gender identity” are in fact more inclusive.
• Karl Rove says marriage equality won’t be as big an issue in the 2008 election as it was in 2004. He should know, having made it a rallying issue for conservatives four years ago.
• The Arizona Democratic Party passed a resolution to oppose a state constitutional amendment that would define marriage as “one man, one woman.”
• The family of 15-year-old Larry King, shot to death by a classmate in Oxnard, California, is suing the school district for allowing their son to wear makeup and feminine clothing to school, actions they say led to his death. (No, a homophobic peer with behavioral problems and a gun led to his death.)

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There are only a couple of weeks left until school starts in most areas of the U.S. For those of you with school-age children, here’s a quick poll: